In Your Eyes
by flashpenguin
Summary: Dave Rossi has two weeks to right his wrongs, tell the truth, and win the woman of his dreams. But will it be enough time for him? Part of the SOUL SEARCH SERIES.
1. Chapter 1

**_The sixth and last story in the "Soul Search" Series that began with Daddy's Favourite Fool. Dave Rossi has made some major mistakes while trying to do what is best. Now that he knows what he wants, he is going to go all out to get it. He has two weeks to change one woman's mind, but will that be enough for him and for her? Secrets, lies, and truths will all be exposed as they do some serious soul searching of themselves and each other._**

**Mudgie ALERT!**

**_I don't own Criminal Minds._**

**_Song prompt: In Your Eyes by George Benson_**

* * *

In Your Eyes

David Rossi knew the value of taking risks. Everything he had ever done or achieved in his 55 years on earth was accomplished thru long thought out and calculated risks. Rarely had he ever lost when he took a risk- whether it was bagging the biggest Buck or standing toe to toe with Erin Strauss- he always won. And the woman standing on his porch step, eyes shooting sparks and hands on her hips was no different.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Okay…maybe it was time to rethink his strategy. Think Dave, think! Reaching over, he opened the back door and let Mudgie out. Throwing the door shut, he took a deep breath and walked over to the porch.

"Hello Emily. Fancy meeting you here," Dave greeted her smoothly.

"There is nothing fancy about this meeting; you arranged this."

Dave raised an eyebrow in question. "Really? Why would I do something like that?"

"Don't you dare play that innocent act with me David Rossi! I'm just as good a profiler- if not a better profiler- than you, and I can read when someone is bullshitting me."

"That's why Hotch was able to convince you to come out here?" he mocked.

Emily's eyes narrowed in rage. "You arrogant son of a bitch."

"Yeah, yeah," he waved off. "I've heard it so many times I am beginning to wonder if it isn't my name. Between you, JJ, and Strauss, I'm thinking about changing my name to arrogant son of a bitch; maybe that will get you guys to call me Dave once in a while."

"That isn't funny, and I don't appreciate you changing the subject?"

Dave's mouth twitched with concealed humour. "There's a subject to this conversation?"

"You know very well what I'm talking about. You lied to me."

Dave let out an exasperated breath. "Here we go again. Look, I don't mean to sound rude, and I know that your need to pound this subject into sand is very important to you, but in all honesty can it wait until after we have breakfast?"

Emily crossed her arms across her chest defiantly. "I'm not hungry."

Dave gave her a blank look. "Oh. Actually, I was talking about Mudgie and me. We've been on the road for a couple of hours and we're starving." Pursing his lips, he whistled for the dog who came running to his master. Walking to the door, he tried to hide the small smirk tugging at his mouth. Trying the handle, he found it locked.

"Thanks for securing the house," he threw to Emily and dug out his key. A swift turn and he and Mudgie went inside and closed the door behind them, leaving Emily fuming on the porch.

Dave was busy cleaning up the few dishes he had used when he heard footsteps whisper across the hard wood floor.

"There's a plate for you in the microwave, if you're hungry," Dave offered never taking his eyes off the pan he was washing. Slowly he took his time rinsing it as his ears tuned in to the microwave door opening and closing and the sound of the chair being pulled out.

Placing the pan in the dish-drain, he dried his hands on the towel. Opening the cupboard, he pulled down a coffee cup. Filling it to the rim, he added in a teaspoon of Splenda and stirred it quickly then brought it over to Emily.

"Hear you go," he placed the cup near her elbow.

"Thanks." She kept her eyes on her plate.

"One teaspoon of Splenda, if I remember correctly."

"Thanks," she repeated. An uncomfortable silence filled the room.

"Do you mind if I sit down?" Dave asked. Emily shrugged. "How is it? I haven't had a chance to stock up on the staples, so I had to wing it."

"It's good," Emily mumbled as she took a bite of the toast.

"I guess. Mudgie seemed to like it too, but you know how dog's opinions are when it comes to food." Hearing his name, Mudgie came over and sat close to Emily's chair. Ever so slightly he started to whimper.

"Mudgie," Dave scolded gently, "You already ate; this is Emily's."

Breaking off a corner of her toast, Emily offered it to the pathetic looking dog. "Here you go sweetie." She looked up to see Dave watching her. "What?"

"I'm impressed. I was betting with myself that you were going to give Mudgie your plate."

Emily picked up her coffee cup and sipped the scalding liquid. Her taste buds danced wildly. Dear God the man made perfect coffee! "Well, I might be angry at you, but I don't waste food. Besides, I haven't eaten since yesterday on the BAU jet."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. By the time I brought twenty five vases of flowers into the house and found places for them, I totally forgot about eating. Then Hotch picked me up at six this morning."

"Twenty-five vases of flowers?" Dave repeated slowly.

"I know. Someone sent them to me."

"You don't say. Was there a card?" He concentrated on the bird chirping on the branch outside the window.

"Nothing. It completely threw me. Just the loveliest arrangement of Tulips and Irises."

"Together?"

"I didn't think it was possible. And Reid explained the colours."

"Colours have meanings?" He didn't have to feign surprise by that fact.

"Me too. I mean I know that red means declaration of love. But it seems yellow is hopelessly in love and white is…" she shook her head. "I can't remember what white means."

"Loyalty? Friendship?" Dave supplied. He was at a loss since Valerie had picked out the colours.

"No, that's not it. Anyway, whoever it was also sent me a vase of Marigolds." Her eyes glowed.

"Really?" Now _that_ was something Dave knew because he had researched the flower for October. He had wanted to touch her and it seemed he had; maybe there was hope for him.

Scraping the last bite of food on her plate, Emily laid her fork down and leaned back in the chair. "That was good." Mudgie started whining. Emily looked at Dave. "May I?" He nodded and she put the plate on the floor for Mudgie. When the dog finished, she retrieved the plate and stood up. Dave stopped her.

"I'll get that. You sit and rest," he ordered and walked over to the sink. Speechless, Emily watched him clean the plate and then the sink.

Finished, Dave placed the rag on a hook to dry and washed his hands. "So, what would you like to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"We can go for a walk, fish, sit and read…or I could show you your room."

Emily stiffened. "I don't think so. If you'll borrow me your phone, I'll call Hotch to come and get me."

"No phone reception out this far."

"You're kidding me."

Dave raised an eyebrow. "Maybe, but you'll never know because I'm not giving you my phone."

Em pushed herself away from the table and stood up. "Thank you for a wonderful breakfast. Now if you don't mind, I'm leaving."

"Where are you going?"

"I don't know; anywhere that isn't here with you would be great."

"Emily, think this thru; don't you think there could be a reason why Hotch would bring you out to my place?"

"The man is a closet sadist?"

Dave cocked his head. "Perhaps. That could be why he puts up with Strauss…and me. But honestly, and this could be a long shot, maybe you and I need to talk."

"No, we talked. You did what you had to do. And who you needed to do. Unfortunately I wish I hadn't been one of the whos." Walking away, Emily went into the main room and picked up her overnight bag. Lifting it to her shoulder, she opened the front door and made it to the porch.

As she stepped down into the yard, the sound of nails tapping on the wood rushed after her. Suddenly Mudgie stepped in front of Emily and stopped.

"Come on, Mudgie," Emily coaxed. "Let me get by." Petting Mudgie on the head, Emily tried to step around, but was stopped. Trying a different direction, Emily was thwarted again. "Mudgie! This is not funny; now let me pass," she demanded, her tone a bit rough.

Mudgie turned his head and barred his teeth. Emily stopped cold- as did her blood. This was not good. She closed her eyes and tried to make sense of the moment.

_Okay, Em, let's count up the ways this day has sucked already: Hotch lies to you and leaves you in the middle of nowhere with a man you don't want to ever see again…unless it's on the job and even that is stretching it, and said man's dog has rabies. Yep! And all of this before nine am! What next, a tornado?_

"Having a problem?" Dave called out from the porch.

"Is there a bullet in my gun with your name on it?" Emily replied sarcastically.

"Only one? I'm impressed. I would have thought you'd have a whole box with my name on them."

"I didn't bring them, but then again I didn't know I was going to be out here with you." She turned around to face her captor. "Can you call off your dog?"

Dave leaned against the post and sized up the situation. "It depends; what will you do for me?"

Emily's mouth dropped open. "You're kidding me!"

"Dogs are pretty smart creatures…perhaps more so than humans."

"So are pigs and opossums, but if I remember correctly not one has the common sense to stop and look both ways before crossing the street."

Dave raised an eyebrow. "Touché. But you're doing the same thing you accuse them of doing."

"How do you figure?" _Did the man have to analyze everything to work in his favour?_

"Instead of staying and trying to work this out, you'd rather run away. You don't care if you're right or wrong- you assume you're right- so you feel you don't have to look around to see if the truth is going to nail you as you make a get away."

Emily crossed her arms across her chest and glared at him and the dog. It was a showdown between the woman who thought she was right and the man who wanted to be right.

"Three days Emily. Give me three days to plead my case and if I can't do it, then I will take you back home and never bother you again."

"And what if I say no? What if I say that there is nothing you can do to change my mind; that you are an arrogant son of a bitch?"

Dave shrugged. "That's your choice. But I always pegged you as a reasonable person who was willing to hear both sides of the story."

"Only if both sides of the story make sense. Nothing you've done these past six months even comes close to sense."

"Once again, there you go assuming," Dave grumbled.

"You can't assume what is fact. And there is nothing you can say or do to change my mind."

"You do realize that it's about a ten mile walk back to the road. And you don't have your phone. Are you going to hitch a ride?"

"Maybe. If I have to. I saw a farm house up around the corner."

Dave gave her a quirky grin. "Unfortunately, they are on vacation for the next little while." Thunder rolled in the distance. "Come on Emily, at least stay until the storm is over. Prove to me that you are a politician's daughter and can broker a peace treaty. Even if it's just for three days."

Emily licked her lips. David Rossi was negotiating surrender? Not possible. David Rossi surrendered to no one. Yet, as she looked at the man on the porch, shoulders slumped, eyes pleading for…something, she wondered if three days was too much to ask.

Turning back to Mudgie, Emily backed off. "Okay. You have a deal. Three days."

Dave gave a quick whistle. "Come on Mudgie!" He knelt down to pat the dog as he jumped on to the porch. Quietly he whispered in the canine's ear: "Good boy. I owe you one."

Anger just simmering below the surface, Emily stomped up the steps and stared Dave in the eyes. "Start pleading because your time started three minutes ago." Emily thrust her overnight bag into Dave's hands. "Where is my room?"

Dave smiled as he watched her walk away. "Thought you'd never ask."

"I'm not asking. And there is still a bullet with your name on it if you decide to try pull anything funny or lie to me."

Dave swallowed hard. He knew she meant it.

Turning around, Emily leveled a gaze at him. "And don't think for five seconds that I won't tell that rabid ball of fur all of your lies. Let's see how much of a man's best friend he is when I fill him in on the _wonderful_ Dave Rossi." Stomping up the stairs, Emily disappeared down the hall.

Looking at Mudgie who was sitting loyally by Dave's side with a huge grin on his face, Dave let out a heavy breath. "I am dead."


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks to everyone who have favourited and alerted this story/series. Well, it's going to be a long road for Dave and Emily to make their way back to each other. Poor Mudgie is going to get thrust into the role of peace-keeper while the non-canines try to work out their differences. Poor pup. Emily gets to see a rare side of Dave. Meanwhile, Dave learns that writing an apology has nothing on saying one out loud. But it's still early in the game and it can go either way for everyone involved. So, maybe there's hope._

_I don't own Criminal Minds._

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

The raindrops made a staccato sound in contrast to the quiet inside the house. For two hours Rossi had been sitting at his desk working on a manuscript, while Mudgie lay on a pillow beside his feet. Out of the corner of his eye he glanced at Emily who was curled up on the couch fast asleep.

Removing his glasses, he laid them on the desk as he turned his chair around. Her face relaxed, slight snoring, with an open book on her chest, Dave couldn't help but watch her. She was so peaceful and for a moment he could almost forget the hatred she was feeling toward him. He knew he had done so much to hurt the people he cared for that he could never begin to pay for it all.

Thunder rumbled in the distance and Mudgie let out a little growl. Dave looked at his watch and noticed the time. Standing up he stretched. He should go start dinner. He had a lot of making up to do; maybe this could be the first step on that journey. She couldn't stay mad at him forever.

Scratching Mudgie between the ears, Dave looked at Emily then the dog. "Watch over her," he ordered then left the room. Mudgie lay on his pillow and kept an eye on the sleeping woman.  
*

Emily woke with a jerk. Glancing around her surroundings, it took a moment to realize where she was. Dave's cabin. Out in the middle of nowhere. Alone with Dave.

Maybe it was that she was still coming out of a deep sleep, or maybe it was the soft sound of rain falling but the thought of being alone with Dave Rossi in the middle of nowhere didn't seem as unappealing now as it had earlier.

A soft furry face and cold nose pushed up against her demanding attention. Scratching the soft head, she smiled. "Hi boy. Where is Dave?" she asked. Mudgie gave soft whine and pushed against Emily's hand. "You're a lot of help Mr. Jealous."

Sitting up, Emily looked around the room. Masculine but elegant, rich but not expensive- the room was totally Dave. Rising to her feet, she made her way up the stairs to the bathroom.

A few minutes later she emerged. Slowly she walked down the stairs and took in the paintings on the wall. Italian Renaissance pictures. _Sandro Botticelli's Madonna of The Magnificent. _One of her favourite paintings. Running her finger along the frame, Emily drank in the magnificence of the bold colours.

Moving to the next painting, she drank in the beauty and strength of _Duccio's Maesto Madonna._ Dave's taste in artwork was not only impressive but exquisite. She had seen the framed painting in his office but thought his knowledge of Renaissance art stopped there.

The third and last picture made her catch her breath. Lovingly she touched the glass.

"I couldn't fit the chapel in the cabin, so I had to settle with a photograph." Dave's deep timbre broke thru Emily reverie. Guiltily she stepped back from the picture.

"Sorry." She kept her eyes downcast.

"That's all right. They were meant to be admired, that is why I bought them." Walking over to her, Dave looked at the picture. "This is-"

"Giotto," Emily finished. "This is the inside of the Scrovegni Chapel in Padua."

"I'm impressed."

Emily shrugged. "I spent a summer in Venice and Padua when my mother was ambassador there. That chapel is beyond magnificent."

"I know. I picked this photo up when I visited the chapel about twenty years ago."

Emily looked at Dave. Yet another bit of information she learned about him. Tucking it away for future reference, she went to speak but stopped and sniffed the air. "Are you cooking?"

"I do know how."

"Smells good."

"It tastes better, I can guarantee it."

Emily looked down and away. He was trying, she could do the same. "Need any help?"

"Everything is taken care of, but you can come and keep me company," Dave offered hesitantly.

She smiled softly. "Okay."  
*

"My turn to wash dishes," Emily announced as she stood up and reached for Dave's plate.

"You're my guest," Dave protested.

"Perhaps, but that doesn't mean I can't help out. Besides, you look beat." Taking the dishes into the kitchen, she came back out. "Want me to fill your glass before I take the bottle back?"

"Thanks."

"No problem."

Mudgie whined plaintively. Dave got up, grabbed his wineglass and walked over to the front door to let Mudgie out. The rain had stopped and the cool, crisp air felt good. It was a perfect time to think things thru.

Leaving the door open, Dave stepped out on the porch. The sound of Katydids filled the air. In the distance a Hoot Owl made his presence known. The sound of running water from the kitchen made it to his ears. Inwardly he smiled. They were being pleasant to one another. One tiny hurdle had been cleared. But he wasn't out of the woods yet. They still had to talk.

Fifty different ways he had tried to approach the conversation in his head, but couldn't work how it make it work so she could understand. And she would, she had to; Emily Prentiss was perhaps one of the most reasonable people he had ever known. Unless her trust was betrayed.

He knew where she was coming from and empathized. Five years working for the Gambino Family had taught him that there were two things sacred in this world: Truth and loyalty. Betray one, you can't have the other. And he had betrayed both.

She was going to learn to trust him again. He had always fought for what he wanted and though he made a couple of wrong turns lately, he knew that Emily Prentiss was worth everything he had gone thru.

He felt her come up behind him before she even spoke.

"I think the storm has moved out," she commented.

"I think you're right."

For a long time neither spoke as they soaked up the beautiful ambience of the evening. In the close distance, Mudgie was sniffing around the foliage.

"Dave-"

"Emily-"

"You first," Emily suggested.

Dave took a long sip of his wine. "I wanted to know how you liked dinner. With me."

"It was good. I didn't know you could cook."

"Growing up in a house full of women, I didn't have much choice. My grandmother was determined to pass on her recipes regardless of gender. She never could understand why people would want to go out to eat when they had a perfectly good kitchen at home."

"True. But then again being on the road a lot doesn't afford us an opportunity to cook."

"That's one of the reasons I come out here."

"To cook?" Emily sounded surprised.

"One of the reasons I bought this place was so I could get away from everything. It kind of defeats the purpose to have a cabin in the middle of nowhere and drive in to town to eat out."

"I can see your point." Reaching for his wine glass Emily looked at him. "May I?"

"Go ahead."

Taking a sip of the tart liquid, Emily leaned against the railing and stared up at the moon. "That's a beautiful harvest moon. And look, there is Sagittarius."

"You know your constellations."

"Well, when you're young and bored and growing up out in the desert, you learn to entertain yourself to keep from going crazy." She handed the glass back. "I got a call from JJ the other day."

"Oh?"

"She's sent out the wedding invitations." Long silence. "Are you going?"

Dave shrugged indifferently. "I hadn't given it much thought either way."

"She's expecting us and we are her friends."

"It might be best if I didn't show up."

Emily pursed her lips. "I can see why."

"It's not like that Emily; I talked to her and we cleared the air between us. There are no hard feelings. I guess you were right: shit happens."

"Like what happened between us?"

"I-" Dave released his breath. "I was hoping we could enjoy each other's company for a couple of days before we decided to clear the air."

"I thought that's why you are keeping me here against my will."

"Sarcasm to start a fight? Is that how low you plan to go?"

"I say it's just as good a time to discuss what happened since I'm leaving in two days."

"Would you be willing to listen to reason?" Dave suggested.

"Honestly, I don't think there is anything you can tell me that can explain what you did to me and Jen."

"Let me start with saying I'm sorry."

"Trite cure all to all of the world's ills."

"It's a baby step Em. I'm doing the best I can. I'm not used to groveling. Cut me a break. This is no different than you trying to forgive me." He stared up at the moon. "I never meant to hurt you. And if I could go back and change things, I would have done everything differently. I made mistakes, but I'm human. I'm admitting it, okay? I'm admitting that I was wrong."

Emily rubbed her hands against her arms to ward off a sudden chill. "Thanks for dinner. Good night Dave." Turning around, she went inside.

Dave didn't follow her. He had said more than he had intended, but it was a first step to working his way back. Stepping down on a step, he watched Mudgie frolic in the shrubs. Then checked his watch. Eight fifteen. A little too early to turn in, but it had been a long day. Giving a quick whistle, he called for Mudgie.

Walking back inside, Dave closed the front door and secured the lock. Giving the room a quick glance, he turned out the light and made his way up the stairs. A stop in the bathroom to brush his teeth and then change into his pajamas.

Turning down the covers, he looked for Mudgie. Stepping around the doorway, he noticed the dog lying in front of Emily's bedroom door.

"Come on boy," Dave called. Mudgie raised his head and looked at his master and then set it down with a loud sigh.

Calling again, Dave realized the dog was not going to budge. Giving up, he went back into his room and got into bed. Placing his glasses on his nose, he perused his manuscript.

Emily lay on her bed thinking about the day's events. Hotch had set her up and lied to her. Then to top it off he left her out here with Dave- the one person she didn't want to see. And somehow she got coerced into spending three days with a man who betrayed her and owned a rabid dog. When had her life gotten so crazy?

She had tried to see it from Dave's point of view, but nothing Strauss did warranted his sleeping with JJ. That was the kind of deep betrayal she could never forgive. Although she had suspected something had happened, she hadn't been able to put her finger on anything until that night Dave had come over to her place trying to explain why he was supplementing her cheque.

There was no denying that he had surprised her by taking charge and having his way with her. She had fantasized about him for three years creating scenarios of how to get him alone. Until that night. But even more than him surprising her, Emily had surprised herself by helping him. His kisses had nearly melted her legs, but when he entered her, she could have sworn her world got knocked off its axis. Nothing she had imagined or dreamed of came close to the moment Dave Rossi made her his.

She thought she had died and gone to heaven with each touch. She had felt her heart falling for the man who had tried to do the right thing. Her heart was almost there- and then he called her JJ. It was so soft she wondered if she had heard correctly. Talk about killing the moment. She had fought the urge to pull away when suddenly he broke down in her arms sobbing.

When JJ came back for a quick training session for her replacement, she had watched with concealed interest as her two co-workers went out of their way to avoid one another. But that didn't mean anything because they did work two different areas. It was only after she and JJ went out to dinner that JJ slipped and remarked that she had gone over to Dave's place the night she was fired and she was able to find the missing piece.

It didn't take an expert profiler to put two and two together. Once she analyzed the whole thing, it made perfect sense and it made her sick to her stomach.

"I should have shot him with more than a rubber band," Em muttered and rolled over to find a more comfortable position. Well she only had two days left and then she could go back home and relish in the flowers her secret admirer had sent her. Dave Rossi could take a lesson or two from that guy.

Who ever it was really loved her. That was evident of the red and yellow tulips. Now if only she could remember what the white stood for… yawning, she closed her eyes and gave up thinking. There was always tomorrow to remember what white stood for...

Emily was asleep before finishing the sentence.


	3. Chapter 3

_Third chapter is up. Well, it seems the duo made it thru the night without killing one another. However, Mudgie gives Em an unforgettable wake up call which may change all of that. With twenty four hours remaining on their deal, Em and Dave decide to call it off while Fate has another plan in store for them. Where do they go from here? Only the muse knows._

_I don't own Criminal Minds._

* * *

In Your Eyes

Emily rolled over and curled up against the soft fluffy pillow lying beside her. So soft and cuddly and warm. She liked it…until it licked her face.

"Ugh!" she sputtered and came awake. Sitting up she tried to wipe her face and mouth with the back of her hand. "David Rossi! Come get your dog!" Mudgie moved to the end of the bed and whined pathetically.

Dave was downstairs when he heard Emily shout his name. Setting his coffee down, he ran up the stairs to tend to the situation. Unsure what to expect, he stepped in to the bedroom and stopped. Emily was sitting up in the bed fresh from sleep, her hair mussed, her nightgown dipping down just enough to expose a creamy breast.

Feeling his body stir with desire, Dave swallowed hard and averted his eyes. "What's the problem?"

"What's the problem?" Emily replied indignantly. "Your dog stuck his tongue in my mouth!"

Dave forced himself not to laugh. "I'm sorry."

"What is he doing in my room any way?" Emily got up and grabbed her robe. For a moment the sunlight made the satin gown transparent and outlined that she was naked underneath. Dave tried to concentrate, but he was losing the fight as he tried to squash the urge to throw her on the bed and make love to her. His memory flashed back to how it felt to be buried deep inside of her, while she called out his name…

"Dave! Are you listening to me?"

Dave shook his head guiltily. "I'm sorry; what did you say?"

Emily belted her robe. "I want to know how your dog got in my room!"

"He must have pushed the door open. It won't happen again." Throwing a look at the black Lab, Dave snapped his fingers. "Come on Mudgie, let Emily get ready."

Reluctantly Mudgie got off the bed and followed Dave's command. Dave looked at the dog then at Emily. "I'll close it behind me."

"You'd better."

Dave gave her a look and closed the door. Kneeling beside Mudgie, he took the dog's head in his hands. "Lucky dog." Mudgie wagged his tail in response. "Well, let's go get breakfast ready."  
*

Emily was in a foul mood when she came down to the kitchen. Pouring herself a cup of coffee, she sat at the table and watched Dave.

"What are you making?" she inquired.

"Left-overs. I will need to go into town later. Would you like to go?"

"You're going to give me a furlough? How generous. Did you let Hotch know?" Emily asked sardonically.

Dave turned around from the stove. "Emily, you make it sound like you're a prisoner here."

"I have no phone or internet access…what would you call it?"

"We brought you out here for a little vacation. We just forgot to tell you."

"So you admit that you and Hotch did kidnap me."

"Semantics. Would you have come if Hotch had been truthful?"

"No."

"See? It all works out." He placed a plate in front of her. "As soon as you finish, we can leave."

Emily picked up her fork. "Thank you."

Dave sat down opposite of her. "Hurry so we can leave."  
*

Emily looked at the basket in Dave's hand. "That's a lot for one person."

"You're not gone yet and there are still twelve days left."

"Pretty presumptive on your part."

"I like to be optimistic. Everything works out in its own time and way."

Emily looked at her watch. The next twenty-four hours weren't going to go by fast enough. "Hey, I saw a drugstore down the street. Mind if I stop down there and pick up a few things?"

"Go ahead. I'll meet you at the truck." Dave watched her walk away. He was pretty good at reading people and there was something up with Emily he couldn't put his finger on. Shifting thru the green peppers, he bagged a few and closed them with a twistee tie.

Maybe she was right that sometimes things just couldn't be worked out. The next twenty-four hours couldn't pass fast enough for either of them.

He didn't like to give up, but he also knew when to walk away from a fight. This might be the one time self-preservation trumped wanting to be right.  
*

Emily quickly gathered up some much needed items. She had packed a few things in her overnight bag, but she still needed shampoo and Tylenol and a few other feminine products that didn't sit well in nylon duffel for long periods of time.

Looking around the quaint store, she closed her eyes as the sweet comforting ambience washed over her. She was surprised that there was a soda fountain still existence and lunch counter. It was almost something out of "Leave It Beaver" and although she had to chuckle, it made her feel good in a way she couldn't explain.

Passing by the aisle with perfumes and colognes, she couldn't resist sampling a couple of the items. Picking up the bottle of Celine Dion, she spritzed a little on the inside of her wrist. Grabbing the box, she added it to her basket of items. What the hell could it hurt? Sometimes a woman needed to smell like a woman. Especially when she was trapped in a house with a Neanderthal and a rabid dog. Though which one was which, she was still unsure.

Heading down the next aisle, Emily perused with half-interest the various items. Suddenly she stopped and picked up one item. Why she did so, she had no idea, but the thought had even crossed her mind made her stomach flutter nervously. With shaking hands, she placed the item back on the shelf. Maybe later. Right now she had more important things to think about.

Checking out at the register, the bell over the door jingled. Looking up, she saw Dave come thru the door.

"You ready to go?" he asked.

"Almost."

He nodded. "I'll meet you at the truck."

"Okay." She watched him leave. Turning back to the cashier, she concentrated on the items being rung up.

"You and your husband new to these parts?" the older woman asked as the placed Emily's sale in a plastic bag.

Blushing, Emily shook her head. "Oh no. He's not my husband."

"Really? He sure looked at you like you belonged to him. I've been married thirty five years, and a woman can tell when a man gives a woman that look. That will be twenty two dollars and seventeen cents."

Emily handed over the cash. "We're just co-workers taking a much needed vacation."

"Ah." Handing back the change, the woman took a closer look at Emily. "Are you feeling alright?"

"I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

"You look a little peaked."

"Just really tired. My job took me out of town for a week and I just got back. Still trying to shake the jet lag."

"Well, I hope you get to feeling better. Come back soon."

Taking the bag, Emily flashed her smile. "Thank you. I will." Stepping outside the store, Emily looked up and saw Dave's truck parked beside the curb. Pulling the handle, she got settled in and fastened her seatbelt.

Dave looked at the plastic bag. "You get everything you need?"

"Yeah. You?"

"Wasn't sure how much to get, but I figure Mudgie won't let things go to waste." The miles passed slowly by. Glancing at Emily, Dave took a second glance. "Are you feeling okay?"

"You're the second person to ask me that today. I can't imagine I look that bad."

"I can't put my finger on it, but you look different."

"Well hell Dave, the team just spent a week in Oklahoma where they're having a killer heat wave. Reid and I suffered heat exhaustion while out in the field. Then I get back and before I can rest up, I'm kidnapped against my will and brought out into the boondocks. Thinking I might be able to get some sleep, I get a rude awakening with a dog's tongue in my mouth. So, yeah, I'm looking different; I'm fucking tired."

Dave shifted his eyes from her back to the road. "Sorry I asked. I was only going to offer that if you weren't feeling good, I could take you back to Arlington."

Emily rested her head against the window and relished in the coolness of the pane. "No. I made a promise to give you three days. I keep my promises." Suddenly the strong odor of skunk filled the cab. Dave hurried to turn off the vent.

"Fuck! Where the hell did that come from? Whew!"

Emily grabbed the dashboard. "Stop the truck!"

"What?" Dave asked confused by her sudden outburst. "What's wrong?"

"Stop the truck this instant!" she demanded in a tone Dave had never heard before. And it made him nervous. Quickly he pulled the truck over to the side of the road and turned on the hazards as he threw the engine in park. Emily was out of the cab and thirty feet away before he could unbuckle his seatbelt.

Turning on the radio, he tried to concentrate on something other than his partner losing her dignity. Reaching over in the dashboard, he extracted a travel container of wipes and prepared a couple for when Emily came back to the truck.

Pale, and embarrassed, Emily made her way back to the truck and sat down. Dave handed her the wipes. "Thanks."

"Feeling better."

"That was nasty," Emily breathed.

"It's mating season for the skunks. That is the male's way of attracting the female."

"You're kidding me!"

"No. They say the stronger the odor, the more attractive the male is."

"I will never complain about Aqua Velva and Axe cologne again." Emily finished wiping her mouth and face. Dave reached out and touched Emily's forehead.

"You feel feverish."

"Can you take me home?"

"You have the flu. And if I take you home, who is going to take care of you?"

"I'm a big girl Dave; I can take care of myself."

"Em, you're running a fever. I cannot take you home. Stay with me and when you're better, I'll do anything you want. Okay?"

Emily didn't have the strength to argue. "Okay. But hurry, I think I got rid of everything, but I'm not sure."

Dave didn't have to be told twice.

Pulling into the driveway, he hurried out to help her into the house. Mudgie stood off to the side and watched Dave carry Emily upstairs to the bedroom.

Placing the feverish woman under the covers, Dave stood beside the bed for a moment. "I'm going to get you a glass of water, okay?" Without waiting for a reply, he hurried down the stairs to the kitchen and filled a glass with ice cubes and water.

Back in Emily's room, he placed the glass on the nightstand. Reaching out, he stroked Emily's cheek. "Call me if you need anything, okay? I'll be in my room."

Emily nodded and closed her eyes. Dave watched her for minute and then left. Mudgie jumped up on the bed and lay down. Intently he guarded the ill woman.

"Okay, boy, you take the first shift while I go get things out of the truck." He knew he could trust Mudgie with his life and the way he had taken to Emily assured Dave that everything was going to be okay.

Gathering the grocery bags, he quickly stored the items away then went back out on to the porch. Pulling out his phone, he dialed.

"Hotch? It's Dave. There's a little problem; Em's ill. She wanted me to bring her back, but I'm going to keep her here. It's just the flu. No, we don't need anything. I thought I'd give you an update. Call me back in a couple of days. Have fun with Jack. Bye."

Closing the phone, Dave came back inside. Setting the phone on the end table, he let out his breath. Nothing was going to plan. Not that he wished Emily an illness; it did give him a couple of days to rethink his strategy.

Gathering his manuscript from the dining room table, Dave headed back up the stairs to Emily's room.


	4. Chapter 4

_Poor Em. Stuck in the cabin with Dave, and now she has a bad case of the flu. While in the throes of fever, she reveals a secret to Dave. How will he react?  
_

_I don't own Criminal Minds._

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

_Emily was having the weirdest dream. At least she thought it was a dream. Dave was holding her and talking to her and telling her things she wished she could remember. His voice was so deep and soothing, his touch tender, she almost forgot why she hated him._

_Her body hurt so much it was unbearable. One minute she was on fire trying to cool down, the next she couldn't get warm enough. But his comforting hand was always there. And she loved him. She wanted to tell him, but couldn't as a coughing spasm shook her body. She figured she could tell him later. She was so tired; she needed to sleep._

_Her dreams were a cross between reality and nightmares. He was making love to her, holding her, ripping her clothes off, his mouth like fire across her skin. And when he entered her, she melted against him and let him take her. Her body moved with his, her mouth searched out his for a world shattering kiss as he pounded into her. She could never get enough of him. Calling his name, she moaned "I love you". And she did. If only she could tell him in real life. But just as he got ready to send her over the edge, he leaned down and called her JJ._

_Before she could say anything, he got his satisfaction and left her. She tried to call out for him but couldn't._

* * *

Sitting on the edge of her bed, Dave wiped Emily's forehead with a cool cloth. The fever had spiked- which was a good thing because that was a sign it was close to breaking. But it was so hard to watch her being ravaged by something he couldn't defend her from.

All night- between trips to the bathroom- he had listened to her mumble incoherently in her sleep. Sometimes he caught words and names, but nothing that made any sense. Once or twice she had lashed out at him, but he figured that was the fever running its course. He wasn't sure what she was dreaming but he knew that what ever it was, it was tormenting her and bringing her pleasure at the same time.

"Don't do that," Emily muttered out loud in her delirium.

Immediately Dave was by her side. "Shhh, it's okay. You need to rest."

"I'm not JJ," she muttered and pushed his hands away.

Dave was confused. "What?"

Emily opened her eyes and looked at him. "You called me JJ. My name is Emily." Then she fell back into her feverish sleep.

Dave froze. _You called me JJ._ There was a theory that fever and alcohol never told lies. And if what Em was saying was true, that explained a lot. It explained everything.

Moving from the bed to the chair he watched Emily toss and turn and cursed himself for not being able to do more to help. But fevers, like anything else had to run their course. Curled up on the chair, Dave kept watch over the woman he loved.

* * *

Sunlight fell over Emily's face and brought her back to consciousness. Groaning at the offender of her rest, she tried to roll over but couldn't. Reaching down, she touched something soft and furry and realized it was Mudgie. She tried to smile, but her body hurt. She wasn't sure what had happened, but she hoped that whoever she had a fight with felt twice as bad as she did.

Pushing the blankets back, she looked down and saw that she was wearing pajamas. Confused, she tried to remember if she had packed this particular outfit, but her brain was still too foggy. What she needed was a shower and to wash her hair.

_Where was Dave? _She started to call out for him and stopped. Sitting in a chair by the window, his head resting on his fist, Dave was fast asleep, snoring slightly. Feeling her heart skip a beat, she watched him. So used to seeing him with his guard up, Emily took the opportunity to study his relaxed facial features.

It was so hard to believe that the man sleeping in the chair was the same one who had slept with her best friend and lied to her. Then again, he had risked everything to get her out to the cabin and took care of her while she was ill. Em sighed heavily. If ever a word had been invented to describe a person, she was pretty sure paradox had been invented for David Rossi. And he lived up to every syllable. At that moment, she felt something shift inside. Something she couldn't explain.

Reaching out, she hesitantly touched his knee. Startled he came awake.

"Emily! Thank God!"

"Hi. I'm back," she offered weakly. Inexplicably her eyes filled up with tears at his enthusiastic and relieved greeting.

Dave got up and sat on the edge of the bed. "You scared me there for a minute." He brushed the bangs back from her forehead and touched her forehead. Cool. Normal. "How do you feel?"

"I'm a little shaky," Em replied, though her stomach was still a bit nauseous.

"Considering how high your fever hit, I'm not surprised. I almost considered taking you to the hospital but I was afraid to move you."

Unable to find a response to his comment, Em looked down at her outfit. "Did you put me in this?"

Dave looked uncomfortable. "Yes. I had to get you cooled down." Emily raised her eyebrow. "But I didn't look. I promise." He looked at his watch. "Why don't you go get a shower while I make you something to eat?"

Em bit her lip. There was so much she wanted to ask him, but when she saw the look on his face, she decided it could wait. "Okay."

Dave stood up, called to Mudgie. "Take your time." He closed the door behind him.

Getting up from the bed, Em took a couple of steps and felt her knees go weak. Taking a deep breath, she fought the urge to call for help. She could do this. Grabbing her robe, she slowly and carefully made her way to the bathroom.  
*

Dave heard the patter of feet on the floor and look toward the sound. Em was standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Her hair was freshly washed and she was dressed in a blue terry cloth robe. Her face scrubbed clean, her eyes bright; Dave felt his heart fall fast. He had so much to tell her- so many things he needed to tell her- and when she heard what he had to say, he wondered if he could be strong enough to let her go.

"Coffee?" he asked, trying to start the conversation.

"Thank you." Em pulled a chair out and sat down.

Bringing the mug over, he sat it down in front of her. Taking the chair opposite her, Dave sat and started sipping his coffee. "How are you feeling?"

"Much better. How long have I been out?"

"Almost two days."

"Wow. I haven't been that ill since I had Mono."

"I hope you don't mind, but I called Hotch. Seems Reid and Morgan caught this thing too. What ever it is, it hits hard and fast."

Em looked at Dave and then lowered her eyes. "Thank you."

"It's okay; these things happen. I'm just glad I could help you."

"Me too."

"Actually, to be honest, Mudgie did most of the caring for you. Seems he likes you….a lot."

"Do I hear jealousy?"

Dave shook his head. "No. I don't get jealous. Especially of a dog that barely let me near you."

Em smiled. "Ah. Well, I guess I'm pretty lucky to have both of you here."

Dave held her gaze. "I guess I should take you back now."

Emily looked surprised. "Why?"

"Well, a deal is a deal and the three days are up. I thought you might want to get back home to your flowers," he teased weakly.

"I was thinking about that; is it too late to renegotiate for a couple of more days? I think I owe you that much for taking care of me."

"Are you saying you might want to spend some more time with me?"

"Yeah. I would." Emily reached out and covered his hand with hers. For a long minute neither one spoke. Tentatively, Dave covered her hand with his free one.

"Are you hungry?"

"Very."

Dave stood up. "Well, just sit there and I'll take care of that. Anything in particular?"

"Anything would be fine."

"Well, in that case, be prepared to be surprised." He stepped over to the fridge.

Mudgie came over and rested his head on Emily's lap and whined. Smiling, she scratched his head. _Yeah, spending a couple of more days couldn't hurt. Could it?  
*_

Emily sat on the porch taking in the beautiful scenery just a rock throw from Dave's cabin. She had been all over the world and seen places most people could only read about, but there was something exquisite about these woods.

"What are you thinking about?" Dave asked, sitting on the porch railing puffing on a cigar.

"You might laugh if I told you."

"Never. I appreciate it when people tell me what's on their mind. Especially if it has something to do with my woods."

_His woods. _There was something almost possessive and erotic about the way he said that. Emily had no doubt that when Dave Rossi wanted something he claimed it and let people know about it. It thrilled her and scared her that one man could be so determined and intent. But it didn't surprise her. There was something about him- whether it was the way he talked, dressed or spoke- that let people know he was in charge and that is why it flummoxed her that Strauss continued to bull-doze him and the BAU.

"I was thinking about how your porch needed a swing," Emily replied simply.

Dave puffed thoughtfully. "A swing?"

"I think it would be perfect over in that corner." She pointed to the area. "I think Mudgie would get a kick out of it." Hearing his name, the dog came over and sat next to Emily. "I'm surprised you didn't get one when you bought this place."

"To be honest, the thought never crossed my mind considering not many people come out here."

"Really?" Emily was surprised.

"I bought this place to get away from the horrors of the job; not to entertain. Anyone I bring out here should consider themselves blessed."

"Arrogant."

Dave puffed. "Perhaps. But if arrogant means that I worked hard to get nice things for myself and I believe in pleasing myself before pleasing the people, then so be it." Dave tapped the ash to the ground. "You got some colour back. How are you feeling?"

"A lot better. I still can't believe I slept twelve more hours."

"You took quite a beating. Plus if you did suffer heat exhaustion, that couldn't have helped any. Add that to the flu… you got lucky that someone was around to help you."

"Thank you. I'm just glad it was the flu and not…" Emily stopped herself.

Dave arched an eyebrow. "Not what?"

Emily bit her lip and ducked her head. "Nothing more serious. I mean you are out in the middle of nowhere. It isn't as though there is a hospital right around the corner."

"Point taken." Dave studied her face. She was hiding something. He could tell. She was different, almost like she was on Tuesday. He thought it had been the flu, but she was recovered and that something was still there. And obviously whatever it was, it was on her mind too.

Stubbing out the cigar, Dave got up from his place on the railing. "If you feel up to it, would you like to go for a walk? With me? In the woods?"

Emily smirked. "Will you promise to be a gentleman?"

"I'll bring Mudgie along to chaperone if it makes you feel better."

Holding out her hand to be helped up, she brushed off her jeans. "I have a feeling you couldn't stop him if you tried." Emily reached down and rubbed Mudgie's head and back.

"I take back what I said earlier; I am jealous."

"I figured as much." Emily gave him a knowing wink.  
*

Laughter filled the air along with the sound of rain. Making a mad dash thru the foliage, Dave grabbed Emily's hand.

"Hurry up! I saw lightning."

"Yeah," Emily shouted over the thunder. "It would be just my luck that my wish for you to get hit by lightning would come true and I would be holding your hand."

That propelled Dave to move faster as the rain came down harder. Literally jumping over the porch steps, Dave dragged Emily up behind him onto the safety of the porch.

"I thought the weather man said clear skies today," Emily joked as she brushed the rain from her skin.

"I think he said a _chance_ of clear skies," Dave corrected. Shaking the rain from his hair, he wiped the moisture from his eyes and looked at Emily. And his heart fell hard.

Standing there, drenched, her t-shirt plastered to outline her braless breasts, her hair in curls; Dave tried to concentrate on anything other than her. "Did you really wish for me to get hit by lightning?"

"Not today," came her reply but her eyes were twinkling.

"Good." Dave dipped his head low and his lips hovered over Emily's.

"Dave?" Emily asked breathlessly, her heart was pounding so hard she thought it would jump out of her chest. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know." And he didn't. Somewhere in the house was her gun containing a bullet with his name on it, but the moment was so classic, and the mood so sensual that it would have been a crime to pass it up. Even if it meant it was the last thing he ever did. But could he follow thru?

For a long minute neither one spoke.

Raising his head, Dave looked at Emily. Stepping back, he tried to gather his thoughts. "How about getting dried off and I'll heat something up."

"Sure." Emily stepped back and went into the house. Through the large window in the main room, Dave watched her go up the stairs to her room and close the door.

"Good going David. Next time, don't be so subtle. Just grab her so she can shoot you and get it over with." Dave looked at Mudgie who was sitting on the porch watching with interest. "Get that look off your face; if lightning hits me, it's taking you too."

Mudgie got up and moved out of Dave's range.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Would Dave try to steal a kiss? I think he would. But he didn't. And as much as things were starting to look up for Dave and Em, all that is going to change when Em makes two discoveries that will change her life. What are they? Well, you are going to have to read the chapter.**_

_**Thanks to Tracia for the priceless insight into Dave.**_

_**I don't own Criminal Minds.**_

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

Dave straightened up from the fireplace and replaced the grate. Stepping back, he shoved his hands in his pockets and watched as the flames started slowly and gained in intensity. Slowly he let his breath out as his mind replayed the scene on the porch.

So close. He had come so close to kissing her and destroying all the baby steps he had made to get where he was an hour ago. What the hell was he thinking? Emily had made it clear that she wanted nothing to do with him- hadn't her comment been that she wished him struck by lightning? Okay, that may have been a joke, but it was no joke that upstairs in her room was her purse which contained her service revolver.

Satisfied that the fire was burning well, Dave went into the kitchen and retrieved the bottle of wine and two glasses. Pretty presumptive on his part, but there was always a chance that she could come back downstairs. Pointing the remote at the stereo, he hit play. Within seconds the lovely strains of Lee Ritenour came thru the speakers.

Back in the main room, Dave popped the cork and let the bottle breathe while he waited. Looking at his watch, he wondered what was taking so long. It was for sure that she was in her room engraving his name on a bullet. Threatened so many times in his fifty four years, he never thought he'd live to see the day a woman made good on her threat. Pouring himself a glass of the Rosé, he sipped the rich liquid.

Mudgie's tail started thumping excitedly against the hard wood floor as Emily came down the stairs. Dressed in her nightgown and robe, her hair was still damp, but she had managed to comb out the curls. Dave watched her face and breathed a sigh of relief; she looked normal. There was a chance he could survive the night.

"Care for anything to drink?" Dave offered, his hand gesturing toward the bottle.

"Don't mind if I do?" Emily poured herself a generous portion and picked up the bottle to examine the label. "I'm impressed."

"Nothing but the best money can buy."

"Why not?" Emily took the seat caddy corner to the couch and put her feet on the coffee table. She caught the look Dave gave her. She gave it right back. "Get over it Dave; it's a coffee table and my feet are clean."

"It isn't a foot rest."

"If you actually had guests here, I could see how my feet marring the fine mahogany would get you upset. But you and Mudgie are the only ones who come out here."

"I-"

"Need to get a grip," Emily finished and took a long sip. Looking around, she glanced at the fire. "It is a lovely evening for a fire."

"I thought so to even though the rain had stopped a little while ago. But a chill is in the air. So I thought it was appropriate."

"Good call."

Dave poured himself more wine. "Em…about what happened on the porch…"

"Shit happens."

"I was going to say I got carried away by the moment."

"Exactly." Another sip, she still refused to meet Dave's eyes.

"Okay."

"What do you want me to say? Gosh Dave, that was stupid of you to assume that I would welcome your intrusion of my personal space with an unsolicited kiss. But you didn't do it, and that saves me from having to drive in to town and call Hotch and inform him that I popped a cap in your ass because you sexually harassed me."

Dave watched her face and decided that it was better to err on the side of caution and take what she said as serious. "Well, when you put it that way…"

"It didn't happen. But I wouldn't have stopped you."

"Really?"

Emily shrugged. "You are a helluva kisser. Under different circumstances….who knows. But that is neither here nor there."

The sweet melodic sound of "Is It You" filled the room. Leaning back, Emily closed her eyes and let herself get carried away. Softly her foot tapped in rhythm. Wordlessly, Dave watched her in amusement and surprise.

Feeling his eyes on her, Em opened her eyes. "What?"

"You. The song."

"I love this song. Lee Ritenour's 'Mr. Briefcase' is a classic. And I am not ashamed to say I have this on an LP." She curled her lip in defiance as if daring him to correct her.

"I'm impressed."

"You should be. You aren't the only one who knows something about the arts." She shifted her weight. "Look Dave, I'm tired of fighting. We've had a pretty good couple of days, and I figure we can finish out the week on a good note. Okay?"

"No argument here." Dave flipped thru the stack of 'Field & Stream' magazines on the table top.

Relishing in the music, Em leaned her head back. She was suddenly so tired and chalked it up to overdoing it. Maybe it hadn't been wise to go for a long walk in the woods, but it had been too irresistibly tempting to pass up. The fresh air, the crisp breeze, and warm sunshine had been too perfect to say no to. It had been…

Dave looked up from his magazine to look at Emily who was passed out in the chair. His first thought had been to question the amount of alcohol she had consumed, but his sharp eye picked up that her glass was still nearly full.

Well, she had overdone it today, and the walk and run in the rain didn't help the fact that she was still recovering from a severe case of the flu. Setting the magazine down, Dave stood up and gathered the sleeping woman in his arms.

Her head lolled against his shoulder, snoring softly, her slight body cradled in his arms; Dave realized that of all the women he had held in his lifetime, none had fit so perfect as Emily Prentiss.

Careful not to wake her, Dave carried her up the stairs to her bedroom. Turning the covers down, he laid her down and pulled the blanket up to her shoulder.

Unable to move, Dave stood beside the bed. So beautiful and so peaceful in her slumber, he wondered how they could ever get back to what they had before _that_ night- that horrible night that had changed everything perfect in their lives.

Shaking his head, it was becoming apparently clear with each passing day Dave was losing the battle. Something was going to have to turn in his favour or he was going to cash in his chips and call the game.

Slowly he walked to the door as Mudgie walked in and jumped on the bed. With a sigh, the black Lab took his position at the foot of the bed and dared Dave to say something.

Two against one was never good odds. Leaving the door cracked a bit, Dave left Emily and Mudgie alone and went to his room and soundly closed the door.

* * *

Emily awoke from a heavy slumber and took a moment to look around. How had she gotten into the bedroom? Her last thought was sitting downstairs listening to Lee Ritenour and then her memory was blank. Rubbing her hands across her eyes, she yawned. She was going to take it easy today. She couldn't afford having a relapse before heading back to Quantico.

Hearing Dave's voice downstairs, she smiled. It was time to call a truce. And she was going to make the first move. It would be worth it to see the great profiler speechless. But first she needed a shower. Gathering up a fresh change of clothes, Em stepped out of the bedroom into the hall.

"Dave?" she called out.

"Yeah?"

"I'm going to take a shower. I'll be down in a few minutes."

"Take your time."

Making her way to the bathroom, she closed the door and started the shower. Carefully she undressed and placed her clothing in the hamper.

Catching her reflection in the full length mirror on the door, Em was never one for vanity-she knew she was pretty enough and had a good figure-so she wasn't sure what caused her to check out her profile. Checking closer, Em ran a hand down over her abdomen. Still flat, but there was a slight bump. She knew she felt it.

It had to be her imagination. Shaking her head, she stepped in the shower and pulled the curtain. Too much thinking had led to presuming. Soaping up and rinsing, she took a moment to remember what day it was: Friday. Quickly her brain started calculating. No, there was no way she could be late.

Okay, she had never been what one could call regular-between her job, jumping time zones constantly, and an inadequate diet- stress took a heavy toll on her body. But… it had been nine weeks since Dave had shown up at her place and _it_ happened. Dear God, he hadn't used protection! But she had never given it a thought either.

Turning off the water, Em grabbed the towel and sat down on the toilet. Hot tears of self pity ran down her cheeks.

A baby. It wasn't possible. Not now. Not when everything in her life was crazy and chaotic. But what was that saying: Babies came when they wanted to- whether you are ready for them or not.

_Damn you David Rossi! _All her life she had dreamed of being a mother, of holding her very own baby. But never had her dreams included the FBI lothario in the role of her baby's father. _Damn you again for putting me in this mess!_

Wiping the tears away with her fingertips, Em tried to gather her composure. It wasn't going to do her or the situation any good to worry about something she wasn't even sure was positive. But she had to find out and there was only one way: she had to go into town. And that meant she was going to have to convince Dave to take her.

Dressing quickly, she ran the brush through her hair. Peering at her reflection in the mirror, Em noticed the black circles under her eyes and sighed. She looked like hell, but that could be due to stress and the flu. Maybe once she got her answer she could settle down and get her peace of mind back. Opening the door, she stepped out into the hallway.  
*******

Dave paced the floor. "I know Aaron. It was pretty bad. I should have taken her in, but the fever spiked at one hundred three point two. I couldn't move her. It's a pretty nasty virus. She got up and moved around yesterday, so I think she's on the road to recovery even though she still looks like hell. I agree…she should make an appointment when she gets back to Quantico. I will tell…" Dave turned around and saw Emily staring at him from the top step. _Oh shit!_

Gathering his composure, Dave turned back to the phone. "Yeah. I agree. Aaron, can I call you back? Okay." Flipping the phone shut, Dave braced himself for the fireworks.

Em stepped down the stair case slowly and deliberately. "Just another in your long- and I stress _long_- string of lies."

"It's not what you think."

"No? I wasn't thinking that you told me that there was no phone reception out here and I find you talking with Hotch. Since I wasn't thinking that, tell me what I really saw because I don't want to be misled."

"I never said there _wasn't _reception, I said that _maybe _there wasn't reception."

"I should have known you would lie to me. I just never thought you'd stoop low enough to use Hotch too."

Dave's eyebrow raised in amusement. "_Use_ Hotch too?"

Emily cocked her head. "Hmmm…let me count the names: Strauss, JJ, me, Hotch…"

Dave chuckled darkly. "Let me clue you in sweetheart; _no one_ uses Erin Strauss. The vindictive bitch is not above using _God_ to achieve what she feels is owed to _her_. As for JJ…last time I looked, she was over the age of consent and she _willingly _jumped into bed with _me_! Before you start punishing me for using JJ, remember that I wasn't the one who cheated on Will! And since you want to pull your 'holier than thou' act, let me remind you that you could have said no at any time. But you wanted me too. Or was it someone else's hands stroking me and calling my name and telling me they could take it?"

Blushing fiercely, Emily tried to get her footing. "You son of a bitch! You used me!"

"Are you delusional? I might be guilty of a lot of things, but none of them include using someone."

"What do you call jumping out of the bed after just finishing having sex with JJ and then having sex with me?"

_Don't say it Dave!_ His conscience cautioned. _Don't say it!_ "I _didn't_ jump from JJ to _you_; _five_ whole months passed before anything happened."

"David Rossi broke his own record. That makes me feel better," Emily threw back sarcastically.

"I doubt anything could make you feel better."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that you aren't angry about what happened that night. You're angry because you actually _enjoyed_ it."

"What?" Emily blinked at his comment.

"You're angry because your wall came down and you enjoyed something for the first time in a long time and it took away your control. And you have to take it out on someone, so you choose me."

"That's what you think?"

"That's what I know." Dave tried to reign in his temper. "Look Emily, I don't know what happened between you telling me you were taking a shower and catching me on the phone, but whatever it was, I don't think I want to know. But I'm not going to fight." Dave turned to walk away. He had to get out of the house. Maybe go hunting. Perhaps taking his frustration and anger out on an innocent duck would make him feel better.

"Don't you dare walk away from me! We are not through talking!"

"We? Which 'we' are you talking about? The Emily from three nights ago? Or maybe the Emily who went walking with me in the woods yesterday? Or is this the psycho Emily who has a bullet with my name on it? Tell you what: When you think you can choose a personality for more than five minutes, then I'll be happy to continue this conversation."

"How dare you!" Emily's eyes flashed with anger. "I hate you! I hate what you did to me!"

"Yeah? Well stand in line. You think you're the only one with regrets? There's not a day that goes by that I don't wish I could go back and change that night. That night fucked up everything good in my life!" Dave thundered back.

Feeling as though the air had been sucked out of her lungs, Emily tried to catch her breath. Unable to think, she drew her hand back. Before she could make contact, Dave caught her wrist.

"Uh uh sweetheart. I have a rule: One hit per woman. You lost your chance when you snapped me with the rubber band," he cautioned her in a dark and dangerous tone, his eyes black as coal.

Shaking with anger and blinking back tears, Emily bit her lip as she felt the walls close in. "Give me your keys!" she demanded.

"What for?"

"I have to get out of here! Give me the fucking keys now!"

"The hell I will!" Dave barked. Emily was borderline insane and there was no telling what she might do with a truck- especially with _his _truck!

Emily narrowed her eyes. "You have two choices: either you give me your keys so I can get the hell out of here, or I go upstairs, get my gun, and get your keys myself." Her tone dropped an octave, "It's your choice."

Dave had gone up against a lot of women in his lifetime. It was no secret that his great Aunt Francesca had a temper that could rival Satan's; hell, the woman _had_ outlived _three _husbands! But even on her best and worst day, Aunt Francesca had nothing on the serious threat that came from Emily Prentiss. There _was _a gun upstairs.

With shaking hands, Dave extracted the truck keys from his jeans pocket and handed them over. Emily rushed out the door. "Where are you going?" Dave called out as he watched her jump into the cab and start the engine.

Dave felt himself get pushed aside as Mudgie barreled his way out of the house and toward the truck. Barking loudly, he jumped on the truck door begging to be let in. Quickly, Em reached over and opened the passenger side and let the black Lab in. Then she threw the engine into drive and pealed out of the yard leaving Dave standing on the porch.

Alone.


	6. Chapter 6

_Team Dave or Team Em? Hmmm… It's interesting to see the readers' take on the story and it propels me to keep writing and find out how this story is going to end. So where are we? Dave laid out the truth the only way he can, and Em threatened to shoot him and then stole his truck. Now Em is looking for answers. But will she be ready?_

_I don't own Criminal Minds._

_Song references: "__**What About Now?**__" by Daughtry, "__**Hurting Each Other**__" by The Carpenters, "__**Will You Still Love Me?**__" by Chicago and "__**Hit Me With Your Best Shot**__" Pat Benatar._

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

The black Toyota Tundra dual cab truck sped down the road to freedom. Emily Prentiss's freedom. Or about as much freedom that would be afforded to her when either she was arrested for grand theft auto or she had to take Mudgie home. She really hoped for the sooner rather than the latter. It would be so much easier explaining to Hotch why she was in jail for stealing Dave's truck than for why she shot him. One was a little bit of paperwork while the other would have paperwork for days. And Emily Prentiss HATED paperwork!

Probably as much as she hated tears. Wiping her hand across her eyes, she tried to keep focus on the road while trying to stem the flood pouring from her tear ducts.

_What the hell had just happened?_ She asked herself as she fiddled with the radio and tried to find something to take her mind off of the events that had just transpired less than twenty minutes ago. _Deep breath. Deep breath. Remember you didn't shoot him…although he desperately needed a bullet. Oh hell! David Rossi needed the whole fucking clip lodged in his big fat head! Not that it would damaged anything; only a waste of good bullets. Damn him!_

Hitting search, the first station came in. Emily threw a flummoxed look at Mudgie who turned his head to look out the passenger window.

"_**What about now? What about today?**_

_**What if you're making me, all that I was meant to be?**_

_**What if our love never went away?**_

_**What if it's lost behind words we can never find?**_

_**Baby before it's too late…"**_

Emily hit the search button. "Please be better than the last song," she pleaded.

"_**All my love I give gladly to you.**_

_**All your love you give gladly to me.**_

_**Tell me why then, oh why should it be that**_

_**We go on, hurting each other?**_

_**We go on, hurting each other?**_

_**Making each other cry, breaking each other's heart, tearing each other apart…"**_

"What the hell!" Emily exclaimed and hit the search button again. "What is this? Crappy song day?"

"_**Do you believe a love could run so strong?**_

_**Do you believe a love could pass you by?**_

_**There was no special one for me; **_

_**I was the lonely one you see.**_

_**But then my heart lost all control.**_

_**Now you're all that I know."**_

Emily wanted to scream! This was not happening! "Why are you doing this to me?" She asked no one in particular. "He wronged me! Why am I being punished?" She hit the button one more time.

"_**Well you're a real tough cookie with a long history**_

_**Of breaking little hearts, like the one in me.**_

_**That's okay; let's see how you do it.**_

_**Put up your dukes, let's get down to it.**_

_**Hit me with your best shot!"**_

Emily burst out laughing. Now _**there**_ was the song to describe how she was feeling. Rolling down the window, she turned up the volume and sang at the top of her lungs. Mudgie joined in with his howls.

* * *

David Rossi was fit to be tied! What the hell had just happened? For one minute everything in his life had been back to being perfect and then just like that! Em snapped and went off the deep end. No warning. No heads up. Out from left field she stormed and sucker punched him.

Then to add insult to injury, she stole his truck _and _his dog! None of his wives had ever gone to such extremes. There was no denying each one had threatened to shoot him on more than one occasion, but he had never put much faith in their declaration. Emily, on the other hand, owned a gun capable to make her threat a real one. Hers was the threat he considered a promise.

Pacing the length of the main room Dave tried to make sense out of the chaos. His motto was that there had to be a reason for everything; nothing happened out of coincidence.

"What the hell is trying to prove?" he asked the empty room. "Did she bump her head in the shower and lose her mind? Did Mudgie lose his mind too? How is it I am the only sane person left in the area?"

The sound of his phone ringing brought him out of his mood. Grabbing it, he hit the talk button.

"Hello?" he snapped.

"Dave?" Hotch asked.

"Aaron."

"Is this a good time?"

Dave let out his breath and ran a hand thru his hair. "Not really. Emily and I just had a fight and she stole my truck _and_ my dog."

Hotch was quiet for a moment debating what to say next. "What did you do to her Dave?"

"I'm going to remember that you are my friend before I answer that. The truth is that I did nothing. I thought everything was copacetic, and then she lost her mind."

"Well…considering everything that has transpired, do you blame her?"

"That was no excuse for her threatening to shoot me."

"Did she follow thru?"

"Obviously not," Dave growled. "Look, I told her the first day she was here that the phone reception was iffy at best. So what happens? She walks down the stairs and sees me on the phone."

"Dave…" Hotch had no logical response.

"I made a mistake."

"You're getting good at them. With the way you're going, you are either going to master the art of making mistakes or end up being shot."

"You're a lot of help Aaron."

"Well, I'm not sure what you expect me to say Dave. You made your bed when you slept with JJ and Emily."

"I think I'm aware of my sins."

"At least you're making progress. Do you think she's going to come back?"

"I can hope."

"What are you going to do?"

"Probably go hunting. I need to unwind."

"That might be best before you guys confront one another again. Call me if you need anything."

"I will."

"Meanwhile, I'll start the paperwork explaining your sudden death."

"Very funny Aaron."

"Bye Dave."

"Bye."

Dave hung up. Grabbing his shotgun, Dave reached into the desk for the box of ammunition. Shoving it in his jacket pocket, he opened the door and stepped out on the porch. He debated leaving a note to let Emily know where he went but changed his mind. Locking the door, he closed it and started toward the woods.

* * *

Emily pulled up to the side of the curb at the drugstore. Twice she debated going inside. She had to know. With nothing in her life making sense, she had to be sure of one thing before attempting to sort out all of the other things that were chaotic.

Turning off the engine, Emily gave Mudgie a quick rub. "Stay here boy; I'll be back in a minute, okay?' Her response was a wet kiss. Grabbing her wallet, she opened the door, locked it and closed it behind her.

Pushing the store door open, the bell greeted her.

"Hi!" called out a voice from the register.

"Hello." Emily recognized the woman as the one that had been there earlier in the week. Doris.

"How have you been? Last time I saw you, you were looking a bit under the weather."

"Much better. Turned out I had the flu."

"Oh honey! I'm sorry to hear that." The older lady peered at Emily's features. "You look better. Your man took good care of you I hope."

Emily was tempted to say something but bit her tongue. Dave _had_ taken care of her. Unfortunately it was what transpired afterward that left the bad taste in her mouth.

"He did," Emily affirmed.

"That's good. He looks like good people. And he loves you."

Emily blushed. "Uh…"

"I saw it honey." Doris patted Emily's hand. "I'm going to straighten a shelf. Call me when you are ready to check out, okay?"

Emily nodded and watched the woman walk away. Clearing her mind, she made her way to the aisle she had been down not three days earlier. With shaking hands, she located the item she desperately hoped held all the answers to her most pending questions.

_You can do this Em. What is the worst that can happen? You have to know, _she told herself. Leaving the aisle, she picked up a bag of treats for Mudgie and a couple bags of Reese's Pieces for herself. Not much of a snacker by nature, Em was confused by her choice. She didn't want to think she was craving a particular food as much as she needed to find comfort in something.

Heading to the register, she checked out the gossip magazines. Putting the tabloid back in the rack, she shook her head. As bad as things were with her life at the moment, it could be worse. She could be a Hollywood starlet in free-fall.

"Did you find everything okay?" Doris asked.

"I did." Emily held her breath as the EPT was rung up.

"Congratulations."

Emily gave a shaky laugh. "Nothing is for sure yet."

"Well, a woman doesn't buy one of these unless she knows deep down inside what the answer is but needs confirmation."

"I just want to know the answer." Emily felt her eyes well up.

Doris patted her hand. "Honey, what ever it is, it will work out. And I know your man will be there for you."

Emily bit her lip to keep from crying. "Thank you." Watching Doris bag her items, she handed over the cash and waited for her change.

"You let me know how it turns out, okay?" Doris held out the plastic bag.

"I will." Emily took the bag and walked out of the store. Getting behind the wheel, she leaned her head against the steering wheel and tried to gather her thoughts.

_Get a grip Emily. Get a grip. You don't even know the results and you're already breaking down. Just start the truck and head home. Break down when you get there. And you can drown your problems in a bag of candy. Okay?_

Emily heard Mudgie whine. Lifting her head, she took a deep breath. "It's alright boy. I'm okay. Let's get home and get you a treat." Starting the truck, she put it in gear and pulled away from the curb.  
***

Emily looked at her watch and counted down the seconds. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Time up.

"Okay Emily; you can do this. Deep breath. On three. One. Two. Three." Emily picked up the stick and looked. Twice, three times she read the results.

And the tears began to flow.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Poor Mudgie. Stuck in the middle of two hard heads, knowing all that he knows and not being able to say a word as they both plan their self-destruction. Both Em and Dave are confessing their souls...unfortunately to the wrong person. Will it be too late to go back?**_

_**I don't own Criminal Minds.**_

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

Emily looked at the stick again. It was true. Her deepest fear and biggest wish was confirmed. She was pregnant. _That_ she could handle. What she couldn't handle was that David Rossi was the father.

All of her life she had dreamed of being a mother, of holding a tiny human of her own in her arms. Now her dream had come true while at the same time her world had gone to hell.

_How had everything gotten so crazy?_ Emily wondered and buried her face in her hands and wept. She wanted to tell someone. But who? What could she say? How could she call JJ and tell her what happened? Was she brave enough to confide in her best friend that she had dropped her defenses and let Dave inside one night?

Maybe she could tell Morgan. Though not the closest of friends, they were partners and had helped each other out of many sticky situations. Plus deep down inside they were closet nerds. He wouldn't abandon her. But he _would_ shoot Dave and that would not be a good thing.

Sitting down on the toilet lid, Em tried to gather her thoughts. She _had_ to tell Hotch. No matter what she did or didn't do, she had to let her boss know. And that would be the end of her career. All of her life she had wanted to be something, be someone. She had to prove that she was more than a trust-fund baby with prominent parents. She had failed so badly.

Now she was going to have to crawl back to her parents and beg for help. Even worse than David Rossi being the father of her baby, was knowing that she had just disappointed herself.

Blowing her nose, Emily gathered up the evidence and opened the bathroom door. Mudgie wagged his tail in greeting and followed his best friend into the bedroom.

Placing the EPT box in the bottom drawer, she kicked off her shoes, and lay on the bed. Placing her hands on her abdomen, she knew she couldn't feel anything, but it made her feel good to know that there had to be one person in the world who wasn't going to stand in judgment of her.

Closing her eyes, she wondered how she was going to approach Dave.  
***

Dave noticed the truck in the yard. Emily was back. For a brief moment he felt relief knowing that she was safe.

_But is she sound?_ His mind argued. Dave shook his head. Not funny. But then again, nothing had been funny since that night Strauss ordered him to choose between Emily and JJ. That was the night his life went to hell and everything sane and wonderful in his life ceased. He wished it had been anyone else who had had been forced to make the decision he had been faced with.

_Do you? Do you wish it had been someone else?_

"I don't know damnit! I just know that I didn't do all I could have. I could have funded both women's pay cheque. I could have pulled strings to get Strauss to back down. I caved too quickly; I failed and I hate failing!"

Dave opened the door and stepped inside. Setting his shotgun in its case, he locked the doors. Hanging the keys on the hook, he went into the kitchen. Pulling out the bottle of wine, he poured himself a glass. Tightening the cap, he placed it back in the fridge and closed the door.

Taking the glass into the main room, Dave looked around for any sign of life. Nothing. Maybe it was his gut or all the years of being a profiler, but something didn't feel right.

Climbing the stairs, he carefully opened Emily's door and breathed a sigh of relief. Snoring softly, a small smile on her face, Dave wondered if she had ever looked more beautiful. Stepping inside the room, he moved over to the side of the bed and watched her sleep.

Brushing the hair back from her face, he noticed the dry trail of tears down her cheeks. He had made her cry. The one person he had finally realized he needed in his life and he had done everything to make her feel uncomfortable and unwelcome.

Watching her sleep it dawned on him that he loved her. More than anyone who had ever come into his life before. He could take what he felt for all three of his ex wives and together that wouldn't come close to what he felt for Emily.

And he had hurt her. He had taken his frustrations and sins out on her. His guilt for not being able to stand up to Strauss and save the team; the guilt for betraying his values and sleeping with JJ...last but not least, the guilt of failing himself.

He lived for reason but right now, at this moment, as he watched Emily sleep, Dave could find no logical explanation for what had transpired in the recent months. He had violated her body and her trust and tried to make her feel guilty for his own shortcomings.

What was it his second wife had called him? A sanctimonious bastard to the nth degree. A self-centered egomaniac incapable of realizing his own faults. And that was the kindest things she had hurled at him.

"I'm sorry Em," he whispered. And he was. No matter what it took, he was going to make it up to her. Touching her cheek, he held his breath as she shifted her weight to snuggle deeper in to the pillow. Guiltily he pulled his fingers back. It was done. Over. Complete.

He was going to let her go.

Turning around, he walked toward the door. As he pulled it closed, it was jerked open by Mudgie pushing his body thru.

"Mudgie, what are you doing here? Go back inside with Emily," Dave ordered. Mudgie only whimpered in response. "You heard me. Go back with Emily."

Tail and head down, Mudgie gave Dave a pathetic look, his brown eyes so sad and drawn. Twice he looked at Emily and then back to Dave. Unable to communicate, he did the best he could to let Dave know how he felt. Defeated, he turned around and went back in the room.

Dave closed the door.  
****

The sun was going down turning the sky a beautiful shade of orange and vermilion. Emily sat on the porch watching the change in the horizon and leaned her head against the post. It was so peaceful and perfect and none of it belonged to her. It was Dave's. And he had tried to share it with her and meet her half way but she kept trying to punish him for lying to her and ruining JJ's career.

Hotch's words replayed in her head: _"I couldn't do anything. I wasn't in the position to do what Dave did to help the team. There is no way I could go a year without pay and there is no way in hell I could supplement a co-worker's pay. The team means everything to me and there is nothing I wouldn't sacrifice for my co-workers and friends, but if it comes down to the team or Jack, as cold and callous as it may seem, I will choose Jack every time." _

Mudgie came over and sat down beside her. Wrapping her arms around the Lab's neck, Emily rested her head against the soft fur. Tears of self pity slipped to fall on the black fur.

"Mudgie, I have a confession: I'm not a good person. I've been punishing Dave for not doing enough to save JJ's job, but maybe Hotch was right that there wasn't anything anyone could do to thwart Strauss. I wanted to hate him. He deserved to be hated. Always so controlling and arrogant- wanting things done his way; always thinking he's better. You know for the longest time we were taking bets as to whether or not the word team player was even in his vocabulary." Gently she stroked the soft fur of the one thing that had never judged her.

"But he's really not a bad guy. A little set in his ways and unmovable when the mood strikes him. But he's the best man to have on your side. I just wish I could go back to that one night and change everything to what was good between us. He wished for the same thing. But we can't. I can't change the fact that he slept with JJ. How can you right that wrong?"

Mudgie whined softly.

"I know. I should forgive him for betraying my trust with my best friend, but how can I forgive him for calling me JJ while we were having sex? He hurt me so badly and I wanted to hurt him back twice as much. I don't know when I figured out what happened between him and JJ. But when I pieced it all together, I threw it back at him. I lied and told him that JJ told me about them. She didn't. But I hurt so badly. I hated him and he was so callous about what happened between us. Can you believe he had the audacity to apologize in the middle of a stakeout? Like what did he expect me to do or say? 'Sure Dave; I understand you didn't have a choice. Things happen. I totally forgive you. Wanna go get a drink after we nail this scumbag?' Honestly, do you blame me for getting angry and shooting him with the rubber band?"

The Katydids sang their evening song, while the fireflies danced around. The bushes moved while the day critters settled in and the night critters woke to face another day.

"I love him Mudgie. I love him so much. And not because of what I found out." She brushed the tears away. "But I can't be with him. It would never work out. I would never want him to feel obligated. But I can't fight any more. I don't want to fight anymore. It's over. Tomorrow I'm going to tell him to take me back to Quantico then I'm going to put in for a transfer. That's not wrong of me is it, Mudgie?"

Mudgie kept his comments to himself as the brokenhearted woman wept into his fur.

Unbeknownst to either party on the porch, Dave had been watching and listening at the screen door during Emily's confession. His face devoid of expression, he watched as Emily held on to Mudgie and broke down.

Then quietly he turned around and walked away.


	8. Chapter 8

_**I had planned on wrapping the story up in two chapters, but as I started writing, Dave's side of the story begged to be told. I debated it but who am I to say no to a good-looking Italian devil? So, I let him tell his side of the story. I wasn't sure if a narrative was the right way to approach this chapter, but I have been assured that it does clear up a lot of unanswered questions. And who am I to doubt this person whom I respect more than words can say.**_

_**I don't own Criminal Minds**_

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

It was still dark when Dave got in his truck and made his escape. To where he had no idea, but he had to get away and clear his head and makes sense of the jumbled thoughts running around in his head. He was a control freak and this whole Emily/JJ situation hadn't just knocked him off his game, it had thrown his world off its axis into the black hole of the universe.

To say that Dave hadn't gotten any sleep the night before would have been an understatement. Hell, there were times on stakeouts he had gotten more sleep than last night. Tossing, turning, and replaying what he had heard on the porch had more than fueled his imagination.

She was going to leave him. Cut him loose. Say good-bye. So why did it hurt so much? It wasn't as though he hadn't been prepared to do the same to her, or that he hadn't done it to others before her. But this time it was different. He loved her.

And the funny thing was that he had planned never to fall in love again. Not with anyone. Three failed marriages, countless relationships, and four affairs had proven that love- not team player- wasn't in his vocabulary. Nor was it in his cards. And he had been content to live just fine without it. He had everything else he could have wanted: money, fame, success, a career, and the best team anyone could ever have been blessed with.

For the first and only time in his life, he had felt truly blessed. All of the pieces had come together and he felt he had belonged. Then fucking Erin Strauss had to exact her revenge on him.

Their affair had been brief- almost non-existent- and so insane that unless he actually thought long and hard about it, it almost felt as though it hadn't happened. But it had and it was nothing he was proud of, but he had learned to live with it.

Erin Strauss had been a fresh up and coming agent with a chip on her shoulder. And he had been part of the team delegated to create a behavioural analysis team for the FBI. His reputation preceded him and his sexual urges were always one step ahead of his common sense. He took perverse pleasure knowing that she was chasing him. And he relished in it. What man with his track record wouldn't have? Then one night he took her and marked her for life. And he was gone before the sun came up. Nothing different than he had done to any other woman.

Who would have thought that she would have taken it so personally and when she moved up in rank, her hatred for him only increased? And it didn't stop there: she took it out on every agent he mentored. Thank God most of them transferred before she got too out of hand. Until Aaron Hotchner arrived on the scene.

The young prosecutor turned FBI agent was taken under Dave's wing from day one. In Aaron he had seen himself without the lothario status. Aaron had the drive, desire, and determination to go far and fast and he was beyond impressed.

Unfortunately, the past came back to haunt and between Ruby Ridge, Waco, and Oklahoma City, Dave had seen enough of the world's ills. It was time to call it a day. So he retired. Now maybe Erin Strauss would leave everyone alone without him being there to add fuel to the fire.

He honestly thought she was over what ever bug had crawled up her ass- hell, ten years was long enough to get over any wrong that had been committed. But three years back and things were worse than when he had left. But then again Erin Strauss hadn't been in charge when he retired. Now the power had gone to her head.

He had never known the amount of ego, power, and hatred combined would have lead to that night when she gave him the mother of all ultimatums. Get rid of JJ or Emily. And for the first time since his father's passing, Dave had felt his heart be torn in two. When he told JJ that he felt she could get another job, he meant it. She was smart, intelligent, beautiful, and with FBI on her resume, there was no way she could lose.

He had always admired JJ. She defined cool blonde to a T. Over time his feelings had gone from admiration to lust, to friendship to grow into love. But what kind of love, he was unable to define. He would lay his life down for her in a minute. But he would do that for any member of the team, so it had to be more than love of team member.

When she had shown up at his house, he was shocked and bemused. He had always dreamed of her coming after him, but not after having a hand in her termination. She probably would have shot him if she had been carrying her weapon. Instead she slapped him.

Dave wasn't a best selling writer without knowing where that moment was going to lead. Straight to his bedroom they went. Two broken hearted people trying to make sense out of chaos so they used each other to mend and assuage their grief. For one brief moment Dave thought he had found heaven as his body joined with Jen's. Time seemed to stop, and everything was right in the world. But it had only been for a moment. And just like that, she was gone.

She had done to him what he had done to so many women. She had let him touch heaven with both hands and then yanked it out from under him. He didn't want to believe that she had that power...that he had let her have that power. But when he woke the next morning by himself and he had gone into the bullpen and her office was cleared out, reality hit home.

Dave was in a daze. JJ was gone and he was the reason why. The guilt was too much to bear. But then he would look and see Emily, and know that maybe he had made the right choice. Every two weeks when his accountant phoned to get authorization to send the money to her account, it seemed he had made the right choice.

Until that afternoon Emily stuck her head in his office and told him to be at her place. Her tone was serious and he had no reason to question her suggestion. But a quick call to his accountant revealed that a number had some how been transposed and the money went elsewhere. To say that he was in deep shit would have been understatement.

Storming into Strauss's office he demanded to know what she had told Emily. In her sickeningly sweet authoritarian tone she let him know that the game was up and had told Emily everything. It had taken everything in him not to throttle her. It was a good thing he had asked Hotch to go with him because had he been alone, he would have been lead out of the BAU headquarters in handcuffs.

He should have never gone over to Emily's house that night. He was never big on confrontations and it was for sure she wanted his head on a platter. But he had to clear his name. Strauss was vindictive enough to have told her anything and she was angry enough to believe it all. After all, he had had a hand in the firing of her best friend.

In all of his years of being with women every way possible, he had never experienced what happened at Emily's place. She pushed his buttons, and he pushed back. Neither one was willing to give in and call a truce. That wasn't who he was- he was no give and all take. But she was the same way. David Rossi had finally met his match.

In all of his day dreams of making love to Emily, not one ever entertained shoving her against a wall and violating her. She said she could take it but that was no excuse for the way he treated her. He _had_ used her to ease the pain in his heart for letting the team down and for JJ leaving. And like the dog he was, he tried to mark her as his. But she had seen through him.

If he lived to be a thousand, he would never be able to live down the fact that he had broken down in her arms and sobbed like a baby. But she didn't chastise him or belittle him…she had held him tight and let him get it all out. No woman had ever done that for him except his mother and Nona. She never said a word while he poured out his grief on her shoulder.

And how did he treat her? Like mud under his shoes. It was no surprise she would have been able to put two and two together and discover what had happened between him and JJ. Now that he thought about, he was pretty sure he had called out JJ's name.

Dave groaned. He deserved more than a rubber band to the eye. Emily should have shot him. No one would have blamed her.

And when he had hit rock bottom and thought he didn't have a friend left in the world, Hotch came to his rescue and pulled him up. Never one for sugar-coating the truth, Hotch had hit him alongside the head and told him what the facts were: Dave had fucked up seven ways to Sunday. There was no way around it; he had made his bed and now he had to lie in it. But before he did that, he had to find out which woman was worth fighting for. Or were they worth letting go? Only he could know for sure.

A chance meeting with a blonde angel and her little sister in New York City had made Dave realize what he needed in his life. He wanted Emily. He loved Emily Prentiss more than he had ever thought possible.

A quick call to Hotch had laid the ground work to get Emily out to the cabin for two weeks. He was going to right his wrongs and let her know that no matter what had transpired between them, he knew it could work if she could forgive him and put a little faith in him.

But once again Fate had other ideas and his best laid plans were side-tracked by a bad case of the flu. For two days he sat by Emily's side and tended to her as fever ravaged her body. Helpless to do nothing more than wipe her brow with cool cloths, he prayed for something to happen. Okay, how was he supposed to know that she was going to reveal that he called her JJ?

If she had stabbed him, she couldn't have hurt him more. And he deserved it. Hell, he welcomed it.

As she got back on her feet, he tried to help her out and thought they were crossing the bridge to meet halfway. Until she caught him on the phone. Then everything went down hill from there. Once again he tried to make her give in, but she was a fighter.

This time he had hit her with some truths…truths that only he had come to see and understand. Erin Strauss was a vindictive bitch with a beef toward him and Hotch. She wasn't above using the ends to justify the means. And as much as he was to blame for what transpired between him and JJ, she did willingly go to bed with him. Trained in self-defense, she could have taken him down and left. But she didn't. They had used each other. End of story.

As for Emily…yes, he was harsh in telling her that she had enticed him in to fucking her against a wall because she stroked him and called his name. Harsh? He was wrong. He was hurt and frustrated and he took it out on her. He was usually so good at biting his tongue and walking away, but she knew which of his buttons to push: JJ.

Up until that moment he had never viewed what he had done with both women as anything less than releasing frustration. But when Em told him that he had jumped from JJ's bed to hers made him feel dirty. And he lashed out.

He was so ready to pack her up and send her back to Quantico- hell let Hotch deal with her. He was through with fighting and bending over backwards trying to right his wrongs. There was only so much a man could take before he broke. And this was too much. Then to add insult to injury she stole his truck and dog. Every wrong was dumped on his doorstep at that moment as he watched her peal out of the driveway.

Not sure what to tell her, he avoided her after she woke up from her nap. He just wanted to leave the cabin. Nothing good had come out of this venture. Never again was he going to give in to his emotions. He was thru with women and the whole fucking baggage that accompanied them. He was tired of their moods, their emotions, their...everything.

He had gone into the kitchen to retrieve something when he heard Emily's voice. He didn't mean to eavesdrop but he loved her voice. Standing still, he listened as she poured out her heart to the one thing that never yelled at her or used her to expunge their sins.

She confessed that she loved and hated him, but she was going to let him go. She was tired of fighting and wanted to go back home. And he couldn't blame her.

But could he let her go? There had to be something to make her stay. He needed her. He loved her. He wasn't going to let her walk away. But unless that something miraculously dropped from heaven, she was as good as gone when he got back to the cabin.

As the truck drove into town, Dave realized that he had lost. Everything.


	9. Chapter 9

_Sorry for the delay in posting. This chapter literally kicked my butt to the point I was ready to chuck the whole thing. Thanks to ilovetvalot who pulled me up by the keyboard and told me get it together and start writing. Well, it's coming down to the final countdown before Dave and Em lay everything on the table, but who will make the first step?_

_I don't own Criminal Minds_

_**Song prompt: Mine All Mine by SHe DAISY**_

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

Emily paced the main room. "Where is he?" she asked aloud. Mudgie could only look at her helplessly. Really, what could _he_ say to make her feel better? Laying his head on the floor, he let out a huge sigh and darted his eyes around the room. He was going to make his escape. Soon. It was only fair since the humans had made theirs twice in as many days.

Emily had gotten up early to pack and make her escape back to Quantico. It was clear and evident that nothing good had come out of the past week. They still had the same animosity toward one another and there was no way that could be bridged since neither was willing to bend. But when she knocked on his bedroom door, there was no answer. A quick search around the cabin revealed that both Dave and the truck were gone.

No note. No explanation…even his phone was on the end table. He had left her alone.

How dare he! _How dare he? It's only fair since you did the same thing to him yesterday. Turn about _is_ fair play Emily._

"Turn about is fair play my ass!" Emily growled, but her stomach sank knowing that he could leave her at the cabin until he was ready to pick her up in time for work. Then again she did have his phone if she had to make an emergency call for help to Hotch. But only as a last resort. The _very last_ resort.

Where could he have gone? What had happened to make him think he had to get away and leave her and Mudgie at the cabin?

_There's not a day that goes by that I don't wish I could go back and change that night. That night fucked up everything good in my life!_ Dave's words reverberated in Emily's head.

That night…that horrible night when she had let her guard down. There had been a brief moment when she had almost welcomed Dave taking advantage of the situation. And if the circumstances had been different it might have even been ecstasy. Unfortunately they weren't and it wasn't.

And he regretted it. He told her that if he could go back, he would. And for a second she did…until two blue lines showed up on the EPT. Now she wasn't so sure. Laying her hands on her stomach, Emily gave a protective caress.

"That night was _not_ a mistake," she whispered. How could it have been since she had been blessed with a miracle? And she loved her baby. No matter what Dave did or didn't feel about her or her feelings toward him, they had created a child. Right or wrong, the events of that fateful night were going to make its presence known soon enough.

Hopefully that "soon enough" would wait while she put in for a transfer and got settled where Dave could never find her. But first she had to get back home so she could start the ball rolling.

Looking at her watch, Emily noticed the time. Almost noon. "God, Dave, where are you?" she whispered. Peering out the window, she waited for the truck and her ticket to freedom.

* * *

Dave wiped his mouth with the serviette and pushed his plate back on the counter.

"How was it?" the waitress asked as she cleared Dave's dishes.

"It was good. Thank you," he complimented.

The woman looked closely at Dave as though she was trying to place him, but couldn't. "This is your first time here?"

"I've been in before, but this is my first visit to the lunch counter."

"I thought you looked familiar." She dumped the dishes in a plastic pan. "If you are ready, I can take your check." Dave stood up and reached for his wallet while the lady totaled up his bill. "How is your wife?"

Dave stopped for a moment. "I'm sorry. My wife?"

"The young lady who was in the other day. Pretty brunette, looked a little under the weather."

"Oh." The realization started to dawn on Dave. "She's doing much better…" Dave looked at the name tag. "Doris."

"Thank goodness." She handed over Dave's change. "She was in yesterday and looked better, but all things considered, that's to be expected."

Dave nodded. "She was pretty ill."

"Tell her I send my best."

"I will." Dave placed the change in his wallet and shoved it in the breast pocket of his jacket. He started toward the door.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you congratulations," Doris called out.

Dave turned around. "For what?"

Doris looked at him in sweet surprise. "That you're gonna be a daddy."

Dave had no ready response for the news that hit him out of the blue. _Daddy? When the hell had _that _happened? _He opened his mouth and closed it. "I…" _Oh boy!_

"She bought an EPT. She blamed her attitude on the flu, but any woman who has been there can read the signs." Doris smiled widely and patted Dave's hand. "You take good care of her and that baby of yours."

Dave thanked God that he was an expert profiler capable of keeping his expressions neutral. "I will."

"Come back now," she waved after him.

"Thank you," was Dave's vague response as he left the store.

He had no memory of walking back to the truck and starting it. In a daze, he looked at the gas gage: ¾ of a tank. Just enough to clear his thoughts.

Putting the engine in gear, he pointed the truck northward, and drove. Where to? He had no idea, but anywhere had to be better than here.  
***

The hours and miles clicked over one by one. Dave wasn't sure where he was going, but his brain replayed the conversation with Doris over and over. _Daddy? Pregnant? Baby? Him? Emily? How? What the hell?_

His hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as he guided the truck down the highway. "This isn't happening," he spoke aloud to no one in particular. "This is some kind of cruel joke. I'm not ready to be a father. How the hell did this happen?"

_You know damn well how this happened. And you enjoyed every moment of it,_ his conscience taunted as it pulled up the night he and Emily were together.

"Oh God! This isn't happening!" Dave stormed as his fist slapped the steering wheel in anger. Hotch was right: all of his sins were coming back. "A baby? A baby?"

Pulling the truck over to the side of the road, Dave tried to gather himself together. "What the hell am I supposed to do now? We have no relationship outside the BAU; we haven't talked in months. We don't even like each. What kind of example would that be setting for a child?"

Dave closed his eyes. Fifty five years on planet Earth, three childless marriages…and the one time he stepped over the line in anger, life decided to bless him. What the hell? That didn't make any sense. He had wanted a sign, an answer to his prayers to make Emily stay…but a baby? _That_ was a little extreme.

"Now what do I do? I can't take her back to Quantico, but I can't make her stay. I need something…anything to let me know that what is happening is real; it's meant to be," he prayed. Turning on the radio, he hit search. And then his breath stopped.

It was as though someone had looked inside his life and decided to write about it.

Everything he had and hadn't done was sung back to him. As if God Himself had come down and slapped him, suddenly it was clear what he needed to do: he had to be straight up and honest with her. He needed to lay everything on the table and let her decide if he was worth another try. He had never given a woman that kind of power over his future- hell, every time his ex wives had given him a choice to leave or stay, he chose to leave. He didn't like being challenged. Now he was going to throw his rule book out the window and let Emily make the biggest decision of his life.

_Great, big guy! What if she decides to leave and never see you again?_ His conscience asked.

"I change her mind," Dave replied simply and put the truck in drive.

* * *

Emily was getting worried. It was getting late and still Dave hadn't shown up. "What if something happened? He doesn't have his phone." She paced the main room floor in frustration. "Great Emily; even if he had his phone, you don't have yours so it's not as though he could contact you...even if he wanted to."

Covering her face with her hands, she fought the urge to cry. Mudgie whined plaintively about the same time Emily's stomach growled. Checking her watch, she mentally calculated that it had been nearly 24 hours since she had last eaten. But she really wasn't hungry; she was too worried to eat. And cooking something would be a waste.

It dawned on her: the Reese's Pieces she bought yesterday. That would do. Hurrying upstairs, she pulled out the bottom drawer and extracted the bag of candies. Her eyes caught the EPT box and her stomach tied in knots. She was going to have to tell Dave. There was no way around it. She owed him that much.

Taking the stick from the box, Emily tucked it into the back pocket of her jeans. It was the right thing to do. She couldn't be angry at Dave for holding back on the truth about funding her cheque when she would be holding back the truth on probably the biggest development in both their lives.

* * *

Dave turned on to the road leading to the cabin. He had been gone for over twelve hours but he needed to do some serious thinking. About life. Direction. Purpose. And none of it made any sense. He still had no answers for the future. But the answer he needed to know was what she planned to do. He could lay out the most solid plan but her decision could destroy everything in an instant.

_You can't lose your temper with her,_ his conscience warned. _One wrong step, one wrong move and she will leave and never look back and you will lose them both. Proceed with caution. No amount of self-satisfaction garnered from being right is worth all you can lose._

Dave pulled into the area in front of the cabin and noticed Emily sitting on the porch step eating something. She laid a couple of the items on the step for Mudgie. His heart constricted. _Come on Dave, you can do this!_

Turning off the engine, he got out and walked over to her. "Hello Emily."

She turned her head up to look at him. He noticed the stray tears that still coated her eyelashes. "Hi Dave," she greeted cautiously. _Come on Emily, you can do this!_ She swiped at her nose with the back of her hand. "You're back."

"I am." He looked at the bag in her hand. "What are you eating?"

"Reese's Pieces." She extended the bag. "Want some?" Not exactly an olive branch, but it was a start.

"Sure." He held out his hand as she poured a generous amount in his palm. He looked at the step. "May I?"

Emily scooted over to make room. Silently she chewed on her candies. "You worried me."

"Sorry?"

"You worried me. I woke up this morning and you weren't here." She kept her eyes forward. "You left your phone and Mudgie and I had no way of contacting you. I kept thinking something had happened."

"I needed to get away and do some thinking. Besides, I'm not married to you," Dave responded tightly. "And if I remember correctly, you did the same thing yesterday." _What the hell are you doing provoking her? Are you trying to chase her away?_ He reprimanded himself.

Deep down inside Emily fought the urge to lash out at his unfair attack. She knew he was goading her, but she wasn't going to rise to it. She was tired of fighting. "I know where you're going with this Dave, but I'm not going to fight. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of the half-truths we've been feeding each other. We need to talk."

Her response threw him. He had wanted to catch her off guard, but the opposite had happened. She wanted the truth. But was she ready for it? Was he ready to say it? More so, were they both ready to hear it?

Squaring his shoulders, he turned his head and gave her a piercing look. "Yes, we do. But if we are going to do this, we are going to do it right; no more pussy footing around the subject. Are you willing to lay it all on the table? Are you ready to hear the truth no matter how much it hurts?"

The moment of truth had finally arrived and the decision was all hers. Raising her chin, she met his look. "I'm ready when you are."


	10. Chapter 10

_Well, here is the last chapter. Dave and Em are going to have a long road back to each other as they try to work thru lies, misunderstandings, and pride. After they clear the air will it be enough? Sorry for the extra long chapter, but these two had a lot to work thru._

_Special thanks to ilovetvalot for the perfect Dave response. I so owe you one!_

* * *

**In Your Eyes**

Dave felt his heart race. Emily had called his bluff. It was the moment of truth. Yet his feet refused to move.

Standing up, Emily rolled the top down on the bag of candies. "Alright then, I think we need to go inside."

"Why?"

"I don't want to air our dirty laundry outside for everyone to hear."

"We're in the middle of nowhere Em; only the wildlife can hear us."

Emily flashed him a look. "Don't make this anymore difficult than it already is, please." She pulled open the screen door and walked inside.

"Be careful what you wish for Dave," he muttered to himself. Standing up he went to follow Emily. Pulling the screen door, Mudgie started inside. "No Mudgie; you have to stay outside for this one." If it was going to get nasty, he did not want to be on the receiving end of the Lab's protective nature toward Emily.

Dejected, the dog looked at Emily and whined pitifully. Crossing her arms over her chest, Emily refused to be moved. "You heard him Mudge; now do what your daddy said."

Dave's head went up at her term for him. Was it a slip of the tongue or did it mean…? He was tempted to jump in with both feet and demand to know what she meant but instead he thought it would be best to bide his time.

Tail down, head down, and feeling like his world had come to an end, Mudgie pushed the screen open with his nose and left the two humans to work things out on their own. Turning around three times, he curled up under the window so he could hear everything perfectly.

Inside, the tension was beginning to thicken. Both had a hundred things to say, but neither knew where to start. For a long time the only sound was the ticking of the clock and the crickets.

"Why did you bring me out here?" Emily asked out of the blue.

"What do you mean?"

"I meant, why did you bring me out here? What were your reasons? Or did you have a reason?"

"Did I have to have a reason?"

"For any other rational, reasonable person walking the earth, I would say no. But you're not reasonable or rational when you get focused on something. You're David Rossi." Emily tapped her foot. "I'm not going to ask again Dave."

"I didn't ask you to ask. You took it upon yourself to lead with that question."

She shook her head. "Don't put this all off on me. You recruited Hotch to help bring me out here."

Dave put up his hands. "I don't know why I did. I thought I did, but now I'm not so sure. I wanted us to talk about what happened. I figured enough time had passed and we were calmed down enough to discuss everything like adults."

"So, you're going to tell me why you lied to me the night you called me to come pick your drunken ass up from the bar?"

"I told you the truth."

"No, you told me that you saved my job. You never mentioned that you were going to have to supplement my cheque. Nor did you say that you chose me over JJ. You kept all of this to yourself knowing full well the truth was going to come out."

"What would it have changed if I had told you that I chose you to stay and I made a self-serving sacrifice to make it happen? Would that have made you feel better?"

"I would have switched places with her. I would have made you change your deal and get Strauss to let me go."

"Strauss would have never let you do that. Besides, Will had already taken the job in New Orleans; he didn't know how to tell JJ. It was just perfect timing the way things worked out."

"It wasn't fair."

"Which part?" Dave was confused.

"It was my job; I should have had a say."

"No one got a say. Hotch didn't get a say. I barely got a say. There is no way Strauss would have let you in on this. She was determined to see you and JJ gone. Your presence would have pissed her off and then we would have lost both of you and I couldn't bear that. I barely got her to agree to keep you even with taking a pay cut and funding your pay."

"You lost your pay but got to keep me; was sleeping with JJ consolation for not saving her job?"

"No," Dave snapped.

"So why did you?"

"Why do you need to know?" Dave leveled at her.

"Because I want to believe that deep down inside you are not the horny bastard the FBI rumour mill has labeled you as. I want to believe that it meant something to you." Emily's voice choked with emotion.

"It did. But not in any way I can explain to you…much less myself."

"Did you love her?"

Dave weighed his answer carefully. "I thought I did. But when I go back and think about it, I didn't. I loved who JJ is, and I admire her. At the time I believed that I loved her and I would have done anything to make her stay. But she didn't love me. She loves Will. I thought she didn't belong with a broken down old womanizer like me because I thought I couldn't change. And Will could give her so much more. And in a way he has…he gave her Henry." There was a hint of sadness in his tone.

Emily wasn't sure if he was serious or trying to bait her, so she chose to ignore him. "And me? Why me? Why that night?"

"If I remember correctly, you ordered me over to your place. As for what happened, I'm sorry."

"What part? Me finding out thru Strauss? Or you lying to me?"

"All of it."

"_All_ of it?"

"Emily…I know how you feel and I understand your anger toward me."

"Dave," Emily asked evenly as she tried to suppress her temper. "Why do you think I'm angry at you?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"About what?"

"That night." He didn't want to think how he stepped over the line and lost control because if he did, then what Doris told him might be true. Although Emily hadn't confirmed anything, he didn't want to get his hopes up.

"You're going to have to…eventually. And I mean _eventually_ because it's eating at you. I've seen that look before- the defeated look that you wear when you've lost control and your way."

Dave tried to meet her eyes but couldn't. "I made an ass of myself and took my anger out over my failings on you."

"What do you mean?"

Dave ran his hand thru his hair. "Damnit Emily, I forced myself on you! I violated you to ease my conscience."

"That's what you think?" she asked in astonishment.

"That is what I know!" he raged as everything about that night came to the surface. "I was angry at you and JJ and Strauss, so I took it out on you. I used you to ease my guilt."

"I know you did. And I told you I could take it. But you didn't do what you think you did."

"Yes I did."

Emily felt her temper rise. "No you didn't! You've done plenty of things in your life worthy of playing martyr but don't you dare feel the need to bleed over this! If, and I mean if, you did what you think you did, do you really think you would be standing in front of me right now?" She got up in his face. "Do you think that I wouldn't have shot you? You're a lot of things, but you're not that, and there is no way I am going to let you saddle yourself with that guilt."

"If that's not it, then tell me why you're angry."

She threw up her hands in frustration. "Because you betrayed my trust, and not just with JJ. You could have told me what had happened with Strauss that night. I wouldn't have said anything. That way if and when Strauss called me in to her office and tried to make you look like the bad guy I would have been prepared."

"I couldn't…"

"Bullshit! We've been partners for three years. You've had my back, and I've had yours. You put your career on the line for me. I've trusted you with my deepest darkest secret. So to hear that you couldn't confide about your secret deal makes me feel like you never trusted me."

"Now I wish I had told you."

"I want to believe you, but I don't know. I don't want to think that you got some kind of perverse thrill with Strauss telling me everything."

"The only perverse pleasure I would have gotten would be my hands around her throat as she choked out an apology to you. When I went to her office, I made sure I took Hotch with me." His tone was low and deadly and unmistakable. Emily took a step back. Only twice had she seen that look and both times it had chilled her to the bone. If he had used that look on Strauss, it was no wonder she caved on firing both her and JJ.

"Okay. I take that back." A long heavy silence filled the air. "That doesn't explain why you called me JJ. Was it because you wanted her?"

"I can't make any apologies for that. I'm not even aware that I said it. As for wanting her while I was with you…if I did it wasn't a conscious act."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Emily asked with disbelief.

"It means that I'm a man. And men are stupid creatures. I was confused during that time. I thought I wanted her, really I did. And I would have given my right nut to have her, but in the end, she wasn't what I needed."

"What changed your mind?"

"Hotch…and a chance meeting with a guardian angel in New York."

"Good one Dave," Emily replied sarcastically. "Always a flair for the dramatic."

Dave's cheek twitched. "You wanted straight answers. Well, I'm giving them to you! It just so happened this woman's name was Angelica, but her nickname was Gen. She had a little sister with dark brown hair and brown eyes named, coincidentally, Emily. It was at that moment I realized what Hotch told me about getting my life back on track and deciding who I wanted."

Emily couldn't speak. Dave continued with his confession.

"All my life I've done what I wanted without consequence. I've done things that I'm not proud of and looking back, I'm surprised I wasn't shot by one or all of my ex wives. The only time I've ever had to answer for anything was via divorce lawyers. Now it seems that every wrong I've done is coming back and I don't know how to make things better. But I'm trying…God knows I'm trying."

Emily watched his face and saw how much this was hurting him. "I'm sorry for lying about what JJ said. We did go out that night, but she never actually said anything."

Dave's eyebrows knitted together. "How did you find out?"

Emily rolled her eyes. "I _am_ a profiler. She mentioned that she went over to your place to talk but she tugged on her ear lobe. Then she started to say something but corrected herself. Then I remembered you calling me by her name. I also watched the way you acted around her and all the pieces fell into place."

"So, you decided to throw it back at me?"

"Hell, I was angry Dave. It seemed like you had jumped from one bed to another, then you had the audacity to apologize during a stakeout. It seemed you insulted me at every turn."

"My tact is legendary."

Emily raised her eyebrow. "That it is. When you took that moment to clear your conscience, I decided to get even."

"That's why you hit me with the rubber band?"

"There would have been too much paper work if I had shot you during a stakeout. The rubber band was the lesser of two evils."

Dave tried not to smile. "I admire your restraint."

"What I did was childish. And I'm sorry." Emily felt a tear slip from her eye. Then another.

"We all make mistakes and do things we shouldn't without thinking...God knows, I'm not the saint in this scenario but you need to know that I never meant to hurt you. Of all people, you're the one person I don't want to get hurt, Emily." He reached out and brushed the tears away with his thumb. "If I could go back and change things, I would. In a minute."

"I know; that night. You said so. I just wish you hadn't."

"I meant it."

"I know you have regrets about that night. But it was far from being a mistake."

Dave's hand stilled and his look became serious. "What are you talking about?"

The tears came a little faster. "The night you came over. The night you said changed everything."

"Em, I wasn't talking about _that_ night, I was talking about the night Strauss gave me the ultimatum."

"What?"

"You wanted the truth; I'm giving it to you. There are certain things about the night we were together that I wish I could do differently…that's no lie, but I think subconsciously I always wanted to be with you. I just wish I had gone about it differently." Dave paused. Now it was time to call her bluff. "I only wish some good had come from it."

Emily looked down. It was the moment of truth. Reaching in to her back pocket, she hesitated for a moment then handed him the stick.

Dave looked at the stick and then at Emily. It was true. He was going to be a father. Reality started to dawn on him making his hand shake.

"I wasn't going to tell you," Emily faltered. "I was hoping that you would take me back to Quantico so I could put in for a transfer."

Dave became alarmed. "Why? What were you going to do?"

Slowly his meaning dawned on her. "No! I would never do that! I know it sounds crazy, but I love my baby."

"But you weren't going to tell me."

"I wasn't going to tell anyone," she amended as she tried to hold on to her composure.

"Why?" Dave had his suspicions but he wanted to hear it from her.

"I was scared. All my life I wanted a child I could call my own." She turned around so he couldn't see her tears. She wrapped her arms across her chest as though to ward off a chill only she could feel. Her voice cracked, but her tone was steady.

"They lie when they tell you can't miss what you never had. And it's true- to a point. At the beginning, you don't feel the emptiness, but eventually you do. It starts out with your arms aching occasionally, then a little self-doubt creeps in, and then one day you wake up and realize that your baby would have been graduating college this year. You think you buried that pain, but it's like a festering sore that seeps slowly into your mind and heart. And _everything_ just comes to the surface." She brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. "And it hurts." Dave didn't respond because there was nothing he could say, so he let her talk.

"I had given up the thought of ever being a mother. And I could live with it. Then this happened. This baby is a miracle. No matter the circumstances it was conceived, I love this baby." She got quiet. "I know how you feel about children…I won't burden you to be part of our lives. I promise that I won't ever bother you."

Dave digested her words carefully. Reaching out, he touched her shoulder. "Em, turn around." She resisted. "Emily, I need you to look at me. Please." She did, but she kept her eyes downcast. "I'm sorry. It was wrong of me to assume that of you."

"You had the right; all things considered."

"No," he contradicted. "I have no right. What you were at fifteen is nothing like the woman you are now. You've lived and learned. You've made mistakes, but you've learned from them. I would like to think that I've done the same. None of us are who we used to be." His finger reached under her chin so her eyes could meet his. "I don't know where you heard that I didn't want children, but that's not exactly true."

"You know how the rumour mill at the FBI is," Emily admitted reluctantly.

Dave gave a half smile. "That I do know. But _they_ were wrong; I've always wanted children. I even told Hotch once that no matter how bad my marriages were, if even one of them had produced a child, I would have fought tooth and nail to make it work; regardless of how my wives felt about me. Children are gifts, miracles. And this one is no exception."

"Dave, don't say it," Emily pleaded though her heart picked up speed at the thought he _might_ want to be a part of her and the baby's lives.

"I want to be part of this child's life. I'll take anything you give me. But I think you know that I have a greedy personality and I'm going to want more. I'm not going to lie; I'm going to want it all. Every cry, diaper change, step…I want to be there. I am promising to be there."

Emily swallowed hard and squared her shoulders. "Well, I think you know that I'm stubborn too. I know that you mean well and any other woman would appreciate David Rossi riding in on a white horse and saving the day. But this is the twenty first century and I am quite capable of raising a child on my own. I don't want you nor do I want your money. I don't want _anything_ from you."

Her words hung in the air. Dave tried to catch his breath. It was true that all of his sins were catching up with him. Everything he had ever thrown away in his life regardless of its meaning now stared him in the face and was about to walk away. For good. And it hurt because there was nothing he could say to change her mind.

Emily took a shuddered breath. "I don't want you," she repeated and took his hand in hers. Gently she placed it on her abdomen. "But _we_ need you."

Dave's eyes filled with tears. "Did you say _we_?"

She nodded. "I don't know where you and I go from here, but I want to try to make it better than what we've had. We owe our child that much."

Looking in her eyes, Dave felt his heart fall for the first time in his life. "I believe that honesty is the cornerstone of any relationship. That being said, I want you to know that I won't make you promises because I take things day by day. That way when changes happen, I'm prepared for them. If you think you can handle that, then… you're one step ahead of my ex-wives."

Emily smiled thru her tears. "You aren't going to ask me to marry you, are you?"

Dave shook his head. "No. I would never insult you by doing that. Although, five years ago I would have thrown you over my shoulder and dragged you to the justice of the peace before taking you down to the Baby Gap so we could furnish the nursery." He watched Emily draw her eyebrows together. "What?"

"I'm trying to picture you in a Baby Gap."

"You might be surprised at the lengths I will go to provide nothing but the best for _our_ child."

"I was afraid you would say that. Dave, is there any way we can take this slow?"

He tried to process her request. "Slow as in by the time we agree on something our child could be graduating medical school? Or slow in that we will make it legal right before the munchkin makes their debut?"

"Slow enough so I can figure out what I want out of this…relationship."

"Sounds good…for now. I think I can hold back for a while" He brushed her hair back. "I promise that I won't pressure you, but I do have one request: I would like to kiss the mother of my child."

Emily bit her lip. "Yes," she breathed.

Covering her lips with his, Dave slowly moved his mouth over hers. Unlike the first time when he took what he wanted, now he took his time discovering what had always been right in front of his eyes. Gently he possessed her mouth and when he asked for access, she let him in. Trust had to be earned, and though letting him in wasn't much, it was a start.

In the right direction.

For the both of them.

* * *

_**I think I finally know you,  
**__**I can see beyond your smile.  
I think I can show you  
That what we have is still worthwhile.  
Don't you know that love's just like a thread  
That's keeps unraveling but then it ties us back  
Together in the end.**_

_**In your eyes, I can see my dreams reflections.  
In your eyes, I found the answers to my questions.  
In your eyes, I can see the reasons why our love's alive.  
In your eyes.  
**__**We're drifting safely back to shore.  
I think I finally learned to love you more.**_

_**You warned me that life changes;  
That no one really knows whether time will make us  
Strangers, or whether time will make us grow.  
Even though the winds of time will change  
In a world where nothing stays the same.  
Through it all our love will still remain.**_

_**In your eyes, I can see my dreams reflections.  
In your eyes, I found the answers to my questions.  
In your eyes, I can see the reasons why our love's alive.  
In your eyes.  
**__**We're drifting safely back to shore.  
I think I finally learned to love you more.**_


End file.
